Dementophobia • tyler joseph •

blurryface // entry

July 21st, 2013

I keep telling myself that I'm not angry at Tyler for looking at my file. He was just curious, but I knew I was lying to myself. How could I not be angry? He purposely invaded my privacy just because I wouldn't talk to him. I was livid.

However, I did not need to ignore Tyler because of it. I needed a friend in this place and I think Tyler did too. So when I asked Mr. Baker if I could eat lunch in the actual cafeteria, he was quite shocked, but didn't protest.

The moment I stepped foot in the cafeteria it seemed like everyone's eyes were targeting me and that was probably true. I was considered the ghost of this asylum really. Nobody saw me hardly, but they knew I existed and they knew I was crazy. I slowly made my way to the end of the lunch line and people inched themselves away from me.

A few curious people actually said hi to me, but I was too shy to respond back. I grabbed a tray off of the rack and inched my way through the line, trying to avoid everyone. I wanted to talk to Tyler. That was the main reason why I was here.

The lunch lady smiled at me before serving me country fried steak and a glass of orange juice that I asked for. I felt like a ship lost at sea in the crowd of people. Everyone had their own friends and I couldn't find Tyler at all. Soon enough, I felt a hand softly touch my shoulder.

I turned my head to see none other than Tyler's roommate, the one with the bright red hair, but his name seemed to escape me.

"You looking for Tyler?" He asked. I nodded, my voice refusing to work properly. The boy smiled. "Follow me then. Him and I usually sit at the little table in the corner. However, Tyler is running a bit late today for some reason."

He lead me over to a table that was pretty much cut off from the rest of the cafeteria. "Tyler was the one that picked this table. He likes how far it is from everyone else." One boy was sitting by himself, but when we reached the table and sat down, he automatically perked up.

"Hi, Pete," he said, smiling. When he noticed me, his face turned into a look of curiosity. "Who's this?"

The boy with dark hair had to be one of the most tired looking people I had seen come through this hospital. The dark circles he possessed actually made his eyes look sunken in. I suffered from insomnia, but this boy had to go to two or three days without sleeping even once.

"I'm Courtney," I said, softly, sitting down next to Pete.

The boy's eyes lit up. "So this is the girl who's file you stole with Tyler?" Pete nodded, his face becoming red.

"Does the whole hospital know you took my file?" I asked Pete.

"Pretty much," the tired boy answered for him. "I'm Billie Joe Armstrong."

That name seemed quite familiar to me, but I couldn't understand why. For the last two years I had been staying inside my room aside from the support groups, which I knew he wasn't a part of.

"Nice to meet you," I responded. "How long have you been here?"

"Two years," Billie responded.

My mind flashed back to the first time I walked into a classroom in this place. My first day of school here involved me having to partner up with someone and that causing me to have a panic attack. I remember my teacher saying that my partner's name was Billie.

Both Billie and Pete really nice to me. Pete even said he liked thought of Tyler and I being a couple. It was weird to think people actually shipped us together.

Finally Tyler showed up and his eyes grew big as he noticed that I was sitting at his table.

"Um, hi, Courtney," he stuttered out, throwing his backpack down onto a chair next to Billie.

I smiled at him. "Hi, Tyler."

Billie and Pete were grinning at both of us like idiots and I swear they were acting like teenage girls.

"What are you doing here?" He asked, "You usually eat in your room."

I shrugged. "Just got tired of having no one to talk to. I thought maybe this way I could make new friends and keep the one I have."

Tyler's face took on a look of hope. "Does that mean you forgive me for your file?"

"I will always forgive you no matter what, Tyler."

Courtney Akehurst, entry number ??? of Blurryface.
Written in pen on July 21st at 3:29 pm.