Undefined - The Zephyr Book 1 ? (completed)(#Wattys2016)

Chapter 30 - Cello

30 - Cello

I don't do well with hospitals. Doctors and nurses excluded, no one does very well with hospitals. After a while the conversation dies down and Syianne looks like she's about to fall asleep — I take the cue and steer the other two out of the room.

"Someone should stay with her tonight," Fellin says the moment he exits the room. "If she wakes up and no one's here she might be lonely. So I think I'll — "

"I'll stay," I don't mean to cut him off, but Syianne and I had been through a lot together, I know that I'll be the first person she'd want to see today. "I won't be able to sleep tonight anyway," I can't look at Fellin when I say this. I've always had a hard time talking about the way I feel. In that sense, despite his boyish appearance, Fellin is my superior. He understands what I'm implying without me having to put any effort into explaining myself.

"She'll be okay."

"I could have stopped this if I had come with her," I say the words that I clearly planned not to say. I feel the weight of the thought that I tried to push away.

Fellin shakes his head, "What could you have possibly —?"

"We could have simply flown away," I whisper, my eyes glazing over, "or Risa would have torn them to pieces. What are a few mere humans in the face of an angry Alprine?"

Fellin moves away from me, taken aback by my words. I've also managed to surprise myself, but when I think of what they did to Syianne, the thoughts in my head are vicious and I can't help but blame everything, including myself.

"That still doesn't make it your fault," Fellin says, clenching his jaw. "You're not her guardian — she would have resisted you if you tried to be."

I sigh, "You're right, I'm sorry."

Fellin pats my back and I turn in time to see Minty wrapping her arm around his shoulders, "Don't worry, Fell, Cello's a good boy. He'll keep his hands to himself even when she's asleep." She winks at me from over her shoulder as she steers Fellin away.

"I don't know about that, doesn't he look like he's thinking dirty thoughts?" Fellin offers cheerfully.

"He's not the type of boy to take the initiative," Minty replies.

"I heard that," I call after them.

Minty stops and looks at me, "And?"

I stick my hands in my pockets; she has that ability to make me utterly self-conscious, "Nothing."

"See?" They continue to talk as they walk away. I hear Minty's loud banter rising and falling accompanied by Fellin's boyish hooting. It looks like those two hit it off; I wonder if Fellin thinks he can get it on with Minty. I wish him luck.

With that thought I sit on the hard wooden bench in the corridor. The white linoleum floor is exactly like the one at the small family run hospital in Aafta. I'm suddenly thinking of Lane who had been brought in there while hanging on to the last strings of her life. I waited in a dark corridor like this, it even smelled the same. And then the doctor came and told Lane's parents that she had passed. I was just sitting there, the person who found her, the one who had cared about her the most. They had been bickering, blaming each other for her demise while I sat and cried.

But they were the ones who were allowed to mourn.

I think about my mom and look at my watch. It's 10:30 PM, she's home, eating kale chips in front of the television with her pink fluffy slippers on her feet and a towel wrapped around her wet hair. If I was there, I'd make her tea before going to bed, and she'd probably ask me to pass her the remote control which she always leaves next to the TV after turning it on.