A night with Mr. Arrogant

Chapter 1

One text. Syllables and words with meaningless "sorry" at the end. One text but it broke something inside me. Millions of pieces crushed inside my heart but it seems I was the only one hearing it louder than ever. It only took one text from him and all the efforts I poured shattered that night.

I stared down at my phone, at the text one more time as if disbelieving what my eyes had seen.

Gerard <3 (+639XXxxxxxxx)

8:45PM

"Saturday night ball game at Rey's. Can't make it for dinner. Sorry"

My knees went weak and I felt the couch catching all my weight in a flopped. I stared at the table with candlelight I had so timely put all together for tonight. The platters and the napkin tucked on top of the square plates and the wine just beside it

It took all my self-restraint not to hurl my phone right across the room, to not pull the table linen and scatter all the platters and to flip the table upside down. But I felt my fingers shaking as I held my phone tightly, curling my other hand into a fist. But it was not only my fingers per se, but my whole body was trembling

I hastily wiped my tears away and pulled myself together with a tight-lipped smile—or so I think it was a smile. "Every people in a relationship need to spend some time apart" I said to myself "It's good for us. We just need a time off" I rationalize. It's just a night, It's nothing.

But all those words lack the conviction and so I began to type on my phone all my frustrations, my pent-up anger. "Putangina, Gago ka ba?! I went under time at work, rushed to the grocery, set up everything with this Goddamn table, cooked you a fucking dinner and this? Hindi ka pala pupunta? You know what? Screw you, Asshole"

"Bakit ba walang middle finger na emoji, Bakit ba to? Bakit..." My hands shook once more as I was tempting my thumb to hit send. Tears began to drip on the screen of my phone but I seem to be too engrossed on what to do next.

Just one hit and he'll know. Just one tap and.....

I never found out what would happen if I tap send because I pulled my self together and quickly deleted every single thing I typed.

It is never good to send the message across at the peak of your emotion. I have to stop myself before it's too late. Before I did the most unreasonable and out-of-character text I'll send to my boyfriend.

Instead, I replied "Ganoon ba, 'hun? That's okay. I'll see next tom. Happy Anniversary, I love you"

30 seconds. A minute. Two minutes, I waited for his reply. Two minutes- turned an hour but there was nothing that would lit my phone up. There was nothing. Not even a decency to say I love you too like he always has and should

"His phone's probably dead. Maybe .. Maybe he hasn't read my text." We all start out that way, don't we? But we're only human and we pick at wounds and scabs, and we try to reason out for them.

Gagawa tayo ng excuse, kahit ano para lang sa kanila because we refuse to believe they're anything but the person they were in our hearts and mind. Mga dahilan, mga palusot and we refuse to think otherwise. Paulit ulit pero nakakapagod na. Paulit ulit na lang

"How did we end up like this?" I found myself asking as tears dripped down my face ruining my mascara.

It will start slowly, the way these things often do. One fight, One argument, comments that hit home, jabbing into shards truly hitting home. Those kind that leave you crumbling.

Those were the words that would question ourselves if we even know the person anymore. Missed dates, more excuses and more argument. But it didn't happen there. It couldn't have.