bitter betrayal

blades

i was in my room finishing my homework when..my mother came in my room i was chocked..she had broke out of jail and came home the police were looking for her and she said if i told she would rape me and let men rape me i was scared..i was never brave.. i was a scared child. she walked towards me ... she had something in her hand.. but it was hidden behind her back..i don't know why but i asked/ " whats that?" she smirked and she hit me with a beer bottle i was lucky this time she got my arms..before she hit me i blocked out of instinct she slapped me and went off to a club to woo the men there..sigh..i don't have a clean pair of long sleeve shirts so i will have to put up with it tomorrow..i look down and see the shards of glass every were..i stared blankly at the pieces seeing my reflection disgusted me i was horrible i was worthless..and its all my fault.. i soon fell asleep.. i woke up and cleaned my wounds..i sighed..time for school..i put on a short sleeved shirt that was just blue..and some jeans..i then fixed my hair got my backpack and left.. as i walked i saw a little boy and girl swinging on the same swings me and my brother swung on..he went into depression after a boy was bulling him..then he told me " sis if you ever feel like your worthless dont do anything to kill yourself OK? i nodded my head.. i loved him he would keep me safe from anything but hes not here anymore only memories and those memories hurt me like a knife stabbing me over and over..i just hope one day some one will be there to help me through this.. i see the school and walk up i look up no jocks!! i walked in nope..there's Aidan..he sees me smirks and walk over to me i look up and my eyes widened in fear... he looks at my arm and sees my cuts he then bursts out laughing..and then grabs my arm my cuts wern't healed yet so when he grabbed with that force  it hurt like a mow foe.. i winced in pain and every one stared at us and then laughed some looked away guilty.. why be guilty if you aren't gonna do anything there just the same as the bully..he dropped me and i ran to class i was in my normal seat but today i didnt like i was going to have to go too the asembly since it was in school hours and the pops were gunna say somthing to honor their team mates for winning their last game..i sighed as we got up to go.. as i sit down on the bleachers i look at them at the bottom of the field.. aiden smirked and said these hurt full words " hi everyone.. im so happy that we one and now we need to get rid of someoutcasts..he looked at me.. some people need to keep walking and some fall down to those at the top we are all on top but one..and she fall down to us and she has no purpose here right?!? everyone cheers " he says and that girl is kiyra hahaha she so worthless she is bringing everyone down!!" i started shaking tears dripping from my eyes they could see me i felt there eyes bore into my soul my worthless soul..i stood up with all my pride and threw it a them i didnt care! " i looked at them straight in the eyes and yelled " you want to see me cut i dont cut! i was injured with a bottle hitting my arm!!! i took out my blade and i said " you all want to see me cut well here you go! everyone was in shock...i slit my wrist five times reopening the wounds my mother had givn me the teachers wernt here the were inside...the blood dripped down my arm " ther youall happy now yea i agree with you im wothless ugly dumb but if you think i cought every day your absoulutly wrong! but you wanted me to do this!" aiden was schoked his eyes i showed him that blades are forever crule..i calmy walked up to him and told him my face so emotinless.." i hope you and your 'friends' are happy of what your harsh words have created..becouse my soul is so far deep i dont think anyone could help it..and i calmly walked away..the only friend i have now is my blade of evil..and it has eaten my soul to the core i just hope it will grow back cuz i am just loosing it i look up at the sky " brother if you say not to kill myself...i will hold on a bit longer..just for you..