Homewrecker With A Heart Of Gold (Patrick Stump FanFic ft. Zack Merrick)

Chapter 6

-Zack's POV-

I was in Chase's bedroom, helping him get dressed for the day. "What about this one?" I inquired, pulling out a small t-shirt from my son's dresser and showing it to him.

The little boy shook his head no and I heaved an exasperated sigh, shoving the shirt back in with all of the other rejects and continuing my search for the perfect shirt.

"Are we going to see Patrick today?" He asked innocently.

I froze in place, the words hitting me harder than I would've liked. I swallowed the lump in my throat and glanced back at my son, replying calmly, "No, not today, Chase. Sorry."

"Aww," He murmured, kicking his feet back and forth as he sat on his kid-sized bed. "I really wanted to see him. He told me we would go to the zoo!"

"Well he's got stuff to do today," I explained, pulling out another shirt. However, this time I wasn't going to ask him whether he wanted to wear it or not. I spun around and walked up to him, handing him the article of clothing. "Maybe another time."

"Maybe another time," He repeated dejectedly, taking the shirt into his possession and slipping it over his head. He pulled it down and adjusted it, smiling up at me with his grin that was missing a tooth.

My eyes widened and a gasp slipped past my lips. "Chase, you lost a tooth!"

"I know!" He exclaimed, jumping up and standing on his bed so that he was almost eye level with me. "Daddy, it was the bestest!" He grabbed onto my shoulders and started jumping up and down. "I lost the tooth and then I...then I put it under my pillow before I went to bed and when I woke up...there was two dollars!"

"That's awesome!" I replied, a genuine smile stretching across my face.

"I know! Mommy took me to the candy store and let me get whatever I wanted!" He continued, bursting with energy.

"What'd you get?"

"I got a big rainbow swirly lollipop!"

I chuckled and swooped my son up in his arms, walking across the room with him over my shoulder and picking up a pair of his socks. He was a laughing mess as we walked out, down the bedroom hallway and downstairs.

I reached the bottom step and saw Gwen standing in the living room, holding a photo frame in her hands. Her eyes were glistening in the light that reflected off of the glass protecting the photograph. Chase's laughter attracted his mom's attention and she quickly set the frame down, wiping underneath her teary eyes and forcing a smile on her face.

"Hey guys!" She greeted, approaching us, "Oh my god, Chase, you're dressed before noon! It's a miracle!"

Our little boy giggled, burying his face into my shirt out of embarrassment.

Gwen met my gaze and I could see the hurt behind her light brown irises. She was trying to hide it, trying to act like she hadn't been crying seconds before we came down. She was trying to act like she didn't know I knew something was up, that I was starting to pick up on her conniving little tricks. She was trying to decide whether or not this was the life she wanted to continue to lead, or the one she envisioned with Patrick. And all she felt was hurt.

She blinked and tilted her head down. "So, um, I was thinking maybe we could go somewhere today."

"Let's go to the zoo!" Chase exclaimed.

Gwen feigned a grin. "The zoo? What about the museum or the park?"

"No, I want to go to the zoo. 'Cause then we can pick Patrick up and we can all go together!" Our son explained before chanting "let's go to the zoo" over and over again.

"The zoo sounds like a nice idea," I chimed in, attracting my wife's attention. Her look was devastating. I could tell it wasn't that she didn't want to go to the zoo, it was that she didn't want to go with me. I felt tears form in my eyes, but I refrained from shedding them. "Come on, Gwen, he wants to go to the zoo and it's almost his birthday. Think of it as an early birthday present."

She heaved a sigh and ran a hand through the mop of hair on Chase's head. "I guess so."

"Yay!" He shouted excitedly in my ear, clapping his hands together, "Are we going to get Patrick? Can we please? I want him to come with us!"

It was hard hiding the pain I felt as I heard my son wanted to hang out with someone that wasn't me. He was just like his mom.

I didn't understand. Had I really been away that many times and for that long, that I'd allowed someone to step in for me and take my place as a father and a husband?

No, I couldn't have been.

Sure, spending time at home wasn't something I did very often. However, that didn't mean that I didn't try to be there for Gwen and Chase. Because I did, I really did. I called them whenever I had the chance, I'd video chat with them at whatever time of the day it was where the guys and I were playing to tell them goodnight, and I stopped in whenever we were close by. Like now. But it was evident that my family wanted nothing to do with me. They could care less that I was there. They'd rather have Patrick.

"Not today, Chase," Gwen repeated what I had told him prior, "Maybe another day."

My son groaned and slumped like a rag doll. I lifted him up and set him down on the ground, telling Gwen I needed to use the bathroom before we left. She nodded her head and suggested Chase go did the same.

"But I don't have to go pee!" He complained.

"Yeah, well I don't need you having to go pee when we're in the car, so you better go now," She retorted, giving him a gentle push towards the staircase. He punched the air down by his sides and stomped up the stairs.

I stood there for a little before going to the bathroom we had on the first floor, when suddenly, "Zack, wait."

"What?" I snapped, glancing back over my shoulder at Gwen, my eyes stinging as I fought to keep myself together and not break down in front of her.

"I'm really sorry about Chase. It's just that-"

"It's just that what?" I turned around and crossed my arms over my chest. "It's just that my son would rather have your fucking boy toy around than his own fucking dad?" As soon as those words slipped past my lips, regret washed over me. I crossed the line I never wanted to. I had no right to accuse her of something like that, but my thoughts got the best of me and I couldn't contain them anymore.

"Zack..."

"I'm sorry," I apologized, putting my head in my hands, "I-I don't know why I said that. I didn't mean it, I-"

"No, don't apologize," She muttered, tilting her head down and slipping her hands into the pockets of her pants, "You're not the one who should be apologizing. I should be."

I remained silent, my lack of words speaking the thousand I didn't because I agreed. I wasn't the one who was lying. I wasn't the one who was slowly but surely destroying everything the two of us had worked for. I wasn't the one being unfaithful. So why should I apologize?

"Zack." She walked up to me and bringing her hand up to my face. An expression of remorse appeared on her face, and for a second, I actually believed her when she said, "I'm so sorry."

But then I realized this was how it always was. She never meant it when she said sorry. She just said it because she was supposed to, because she knew it was the gateway to moving on. And this time, I wasn't ready to move on.

"Let's just go to the zoo, okay?" I murmured, stepping away from her and turning around.