Healing Battle Wounds

PROLOGUE

PROLOGUE

I never understood why people are like this. Maybe I'm just so imperfect,never good enough. All those girls with the perfect body, long perfect hair, and those perfect faces. I'm curvy, flat, and my face hasn't yet to mature to anyone's liking.

I'm just another nothing. I'm so tired of feeling this way, i try to push out the thought of ending it all but sometimes i can't escape it. I cope with my problems through a blade. I try not to but my anxiety and depression take over.

I know I'm not the only one to feel this way. I just need a friend. Someone who understands, someone to talk to. I don't need help, i don't need a therapist who is just gonna write in a little note pad about all my problems and think that what they are taught in college is gonna help me.

I feel like when someone wants me to tell them whats wrong, I just cant spit the words out because i know that no matter what i say they aren't gonna understand how i feel because I'm so mixed up that not even i can put into words how trapped, sad, and lonely I am.

The worst feeling is when your walking through the halls and you can feel their eyes on you, judging your every move. I cant even go in public due to my public anxiety. Its not even just at school, its grown to places like the mall or a restaurant.

Another thing is when it follows you home, I've deleted all social medias due to this. I was so tired of logging in and seeing 10 notifications just full of hate and judgment.

But i can never escape it, and I'm so trapped. I'm so tired of crying myself to sleep every night. Suicide isn't an option for me, i may be in a lot of pain but i cant leave this world behind, i have a little sister, she may get on my nerves but i cant leave her, my family would be crushed, i would just make it hard for them. I cant do that to them.

I have 6 months left of school and I'm so ready to leave but i don't know, maybe I might make a friend. I'm so ready to change and be happy again.