Random Frerard Fluff [ONE SHOTS] [COMPLETED]

The Anatomy of a Fuckboy

AU FIC

*TO BE READ IN RAY TORO'S VOICE AT ALL TIMES, TO NOT DO SO IS SIN*

Frank Iero was probably a fuckboy. And that wasn't saying much, really, considering that height-wise, there wasn't much of Frank Iero to even talk about.

Frank was eighteen and only 5'5. Hence why he was a fuckboy - it was short man's syndrome more than anything.

But he was hot, so Gerard supposed it was alright. Gerard was twenty-one and considerably taller, but he wasn't NBA tall by any means. So he couldn't really talk.

Gerard's younger brother Mikey was one of Frank's best friends, and that's how the two boys were of acquaintance.

But I don't want you to get the wrong idea, Mikey most definitely was not a fuckboy. He was more of a meme kid; one of those all-round quiet guys who sat in the back of your class and made endless meme references which somehow managed to either irrefutably annoy or completely amuse the entire student body. Sometimes both the latter and the former occurred simultaneously, and that was when Mikey was in his prime.

Anyway, I've gotten off topic now. Where was I? Oh yeah. Frank Iero.

So Frank Iero was this guy, who Gerard couldn't 'figure out'. He was still confused as to whether Frank was, in reality, nothing more than a fuckboy, or whether he was this blindingly adorable boy-next-door character who put on a façade to hide his real self.

Gerard reckoned he'd gotten closer to cracking the vulnerable side of Frank than anyone else had, and he would occasionally ramble to Mikey about how he had this huge theory where Frank wasn't really a fuckboy and that he was actually a very sensitive male human being who didn't know what to do with his emotions.

To that, Mikey would simply roll his eyes and say:

"What the shit are you on about? Frank's like the biggest fuckboy ever, are you fucking stupid?"

Whereupon Gerard would hastily shut up.

However, there were still little happenstances and behavioural anomalies which didn't add up with the fuckboy persona. Take for instance: that time when Gerard and his mom had decided to embark on the emotional journey of watching My Sister's Keeper together one night. Frank had been over, so naturally he and Mikey had to have walked in to find Gerard sobbing like an idiot. Frank had no other reaction than to merely smile and pat him on the head as he said sympathetically, "There there."

Gerard still didn't know what that meant.

So that is why Gerard was sitting at his desk one very lonely night, drawing up a table when he was supposed to be feeding the dog. The table consisted of two columns. One was topped with, Reasons Why Frank Iero is Definitely a Fuckboy. The other was adorned by a label that read, Reasons Why He Isn't. He had to admit, the second column did fortunately carry more dot points than the first. Gerard, still confused and unsure, sighed dramatically, slamming his fist on the desktop.

"But what is a fuckboy?" he asked aloud in a wonderously voluminous voice, throwing on a crumby British accent for effect. He let out a shaky laugh and laid his head in his arms. "Why does this even bother me so much?" he groaned, far quieter this time.

Naturally, a knock at the door was to follow.

"What?" Gerard dragged out sullenly, disappointed that his brooding was cut so short.

"It's just me," said Frank, who proceeded to crack the bedroom door open an inch. "So um," he started awkwardly, "I don't know if I've caught you at a bad time or anything, but Mikey fell asleep already and I'm really awake, so can I hang out in here for a while?"