You're standing at the edge of your life - or what used to be your life, but do you jump?
It's not only the struggle of not knowing, it's also a journey through your past. It's an emotional roller coaster between live and death. And most of all, i...
I sit on the ground. My back against the car. Or at least what's still left of it. I hear the screams and cries but they seem distanced. Blood is swirling on both sides of my body, my hands pressed against the cold pavement. I'm too afraid to look back around, to see my mom, brother and myself all bruised and bleeding. I'm too afraid to see what really happened. 'Why did I want to see this?' I whisper to myself.
People come running towards the now slightly smoking vehicle. They watch, they see, they all see but none of them does something. None of them helps them, helps us.
'DON'T JUST STAND THERE!' I yell but nobody hears me. Of course not; the real me is dying inside of this bloody car. 'GET THEM OUT OF THERE!' I continue yelling to no one in particular. I close my eyes and pull my knees up to my chest. 'Stop doing this to me!' My chin rests on top of my knees as my eyes start tearing up. 'Leave me alone, just let me go.' I whisper through my gritted teeth, my body filling with rage but too tired to shout.
I look up with soaked eyes and stare at the people in front of me. Why is nobody helping us? With one arm I dry my eyes while finally getting up with my other. So, here I stand. Standing on my feet, shaking on my feet. I inhale deeply. My longs fill with fresh air but it doesn't seem to calm me down at all. One step forward, half spin to the left, open eyes and there it is.
My mom's head is resting against the airbag. If it wasn't for all the blood she could just be sleeping peacefully on a huge white pillow. But what used to be a white pillow is now slowly turning red. No, she's not sleeping. The blood is undeniable and the way her arm is twisted in the wrong way is too.
When I look at the back seats my heart sinks even further. There, in the middle of the three seats, lies my brother. And there are even more bloodstains and twisted limps. I can't stand to watch any longer and move my eyes to the other human in the car. To the body of the young girl that I can never be again. To the body of a beautiful young girl covered in blood and bruises. And then I see the monkey. Alex's favourite stuffed animal that used to be pink, now dark red and lying on the bottom of the car at his feet
This should have never happened. This is something no person should ever be confronted with. Wait, is this where we all died? Is this when we came to the white hell? If so, where are my mom and brother now?
I step closer to the vehicle. The surroundings are still just standing there. Stiff, not moving one single body part. It's like the whole scene has been paused and I'm the only one awake.
Far in the distance I hear the sound of an ambulance, or at least that's what I hope it is. I want to pull the handle of the front door but I can't reach it. As I reach out the car seems to move further and further away. I desperately reach out again but without success. 'LET ME HELP THEM!' I yell. God must still be watching or at least listening, I'm sure of it. 'GOD DAMNIT, JUST LET ME HELP THEM!!' I repeat, rage building up inside of me again.
After trying to reach out again for a few times I give up. I turn around and start running. I run away from the car, past all the frozen surroundings, out of the street where the accident happened. I run and run and run.
Until I finally collapse to the solid ground and unconsciousness catches me.
______________________________
Author's noteeeeeeeeee:
this one's rather short, forgive me lovies
stay strong and positive and remember i love yhou :)
much love,
me.
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
