Bruised Knuckles

2. cold pasta

The house smelled like booze and neglected cigarettes. Despite this, I trudged inside with my baseball uniform still on. I held my cleats in my right hand and stood at the doorway, hoping some fresh nighttime air would sweep all the putrid smells away.

It was only 9:00 PM, and the downstairs level appeared to be free of any lurking humans. Half a pot of mac and cheese was left on the stove, which caught my attention just as my stomach let out a low rumble, my hands dropping my cleats at the door when I realized food was more important.

I fiddled with the silverware drawer until it popped open, the fork that was lodged inside catapulting to the tile floor in an unpleasant, echoing tone. My eyes squeezed shut at the sound, holding my breath until the faint echoing diminished. I didn't want anyone to wake up and come downstairs to socialize with me. I bent down and picked the fork up off of the floor, blowing it clean while I peered inside of the macaroni pot on the stove.

Using my fork, I poked the pasta gently.
It resembled orange rubber and stuck to the bottom of the pot like glue. I struggled to get a forkful of the cold pasta, the taste bland and disgusting when it finally made it into my mouth. I chewed the cold pasta anyway. Sure, I could microwave it, but that almost sounded too unappetizing.

"Whatcha doing?" A familiar voice said, my teeth laying flat against one another instead of chewing once I heard this startling voice. I thought I was alone down here. I turned my head towards the doorway where I thought it came from.

"I'm eating mac and cheese," I said slowly and cautiously with a mouth full of pasta, the answer almost forming a question. I couldn't find the source of the voice so I scanned the living room again instead of the doorway. It sounded like my mom's voice but I couldn't find her body.

"Over here, dipshit," the voice said again, in a harsher rasp this time. Yes, that was my mom. I quickly whipped my head back around to the open doorway which I thought I just checked. She grinned with an intoxicated expression, leaning against the side of the doorframe. Her fingers slowly formed a tight fist, each individual finger curling up into her palm. She planted her fist against her hip, elbow pointing out towards the other side of the doorframe like a dagger. She was operating in slow motion.

Next, her witch-like grin started to unravel to a straight expression, lips slowly parting in an effort to speak to me, "What are you doing?" She said, slurred and careful, making sure each word came out like it was planned in her mind. "I'm eating macaroni and cheese," I said again, just as slowly as the first time to meet her speed. I finally swallowed the half chewed, cold pasta that was sitting in my mouth.

"You look so handsome in that outfit," she said with the same grin creeping back up her face. Regaining her balance by holding the doorway for a second, she started to hobble past me and up the creaky wooden steps with no further conversation.

Halfway up she started coughing, a thick noise that sounded like it came from the very core of her lungs. I watched her stumble a bit and come to a halt, doubling over to cough into the air. I knew she went outside to have a cigarette, that she said she would quit a month ago.

My attention was forced back to the cold pasta, in which looking at it made me angry. I threw my fork down into the pot and brought it over to the sink, filling the pot with warm water. Hopefully the pasta will detach overnight and we won't have to throw the pot away like last time. Pasta is stubborn.

After closing the front door, I headed upstairs. We don't lock anything anymore, because what's the point? We live in a four room shack with a computer from 2001 being the most valuable asset. "If you smack it hard enough, it will turn on," my dad always advised my siblings and me.

Upon entering my room, Devian was spread out with half of his body on my mattress. I still felt angry and I wanted my full twin mattress, not half of my twin mattress so Devian could stretch out.

"Wake up," I said while using my foot to shake Devian's prominent hipbone. He was skin and bones, it almost felt as if I was hurting him.

"What's happening?" He said, slightly dazed while his eyes fluttered sleepily. I gave him one final push with my foot, inhaling deeply, "get back on your mattress."

He rolled a few times until he was on the very edge of his mattress, curling up into a tight, skinny ball. I started to undress myself, letting my dirty uniform drop to the corner of the room. Once in boxers, I curled up on my mattress and eventually grabbed my uniform to drape over my body as covers. It smelled like sweat and dirt but it was better than grabbing a blanket downstairs which smelled like cigarettes.

The next morning, Devian slept in while I got up to shower. Someone left their piss in the toilet overnight and it was starting to smell, but that wasn't my problem.

Nonchalantly, I started the shower and counted to five on my fingers to make sure the water would come out. It started in spurts after three full seconds, two more seconds later and it gained a huge amount of pressure, but before you think you're going to get a high pressure shower, it fizzles out to a weak stream.

I stepped inside of the bathtub and pulled the curtain closed, trying not to focus on the way the bathroom smelled. The water was lukewarm and made me feel as though I was playing outside in a sprinkler, not actually showering.

When I was younger, my mom would always set the sprinkler up in the yard for us on hot summer days. We would take turns jumping and running through the cold water, desperate for a cool down in the scorching sun. Although it didn't get too hot in New Jersey, the sun usually became bothersome.

While I thought about my childhood, I had to mix the soap with water to actually get it to lather, using the same thing for my body and my hair. I realized I was still angry from last night. Actually, I was always angry, even as a child.

I noticed someone creak open the bathroom door, relieved to see the top of Aspen's head over the shower curtain. She flushed the toilet after using it, sniffling while she started the sink which took longer to turn on because I was showering and she just flushed the toilet. I turned the water off in the shower when I noticed she was still struggling after a few seconds with the water, sighing heavily, "I'm clean enough. Close your eyes."

Aspen covered her eyes with her hand while brushing her teeth, apparently with no water, giving me some time to cover my lower abdomen with a towel. I wouldn't give a shit if she saw anything, anyway. We grew together in a uterus for nine months.

I found some clothes that were clean under my mattress, slipping them on. I noticed that Devian had his hand down his boxers, which made me chuckle. He was bound for juvie at some point, especially if he kept skipping school to sell drugs downtown. I waited for Aspen at the front door downstairs, and we started to walk to school when she finally got done brushing her teeth and getting dressed.

"I hope the cafeteria has chocolate chip muffins today," she said with no enthusiasm, even though I know she feels strongly about chocolate chip muffins. We kept walking on the crooked sidewalk towards our high school. The sun was starting to rise and it gave an orange tinted haze across the houses we passed.

"I hope so too," I added, a bit delayed, in hopes of making her feel better. She's always down, sad, and alone. We just can't seem to break through to eachother.

"If they don't, banana is good," I said again, reminiscing on the different kinds of muffins the school cafeteria serves for breakfast.

"I heard we're getting a new student. I don't know if it's true, but they're from Riverside. " Aspen quickly changed our conversation.

"Oh yeah? I can't wait to meet them," I said with a slight sarcastic chuckle.

"Him," Aspen clarified.

Kids from Riverside have their heads up their asses, and I couldn't wait to pull his out.

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The picture above is kind of how I imagine the MC, Orion. I'm so excited to share this with all of you and I hope you liked this chapter! thank you to everyone who reads, comments, votes, adds this to their reading list, whatever! you're appreciated.