Friends?

seven

Making a detour to Diamond City was longer than I expected, but the weather was nice, and the loot from the raiders we got to fight was generous. We stopped for the night and this time, Hancock took his sleep break first. I insisted. While he snored, I took a mentat and tried to crack an old terminal in the abandoned building we decided to call home for the night. Even with the assistance of a chem, I had no luck. I was a lawyer and housewife, not an IT girl.

I doubted the terminal even had anything of interest on it. I only played around to keep myself busy. I didn't want to be alone with my thoughts. But there I was. My thought brought me to Nate's death again. Shaun's kidnapping. I closed my fist around Nate's warm wedding ring. Tears slowly fell from the corners of my eyes. My family was gone in what felt like a day, a short moment. Hancock turned in his bedroll. I snapped my head up and wiped my tears, but he was still asleep. He continued to snore soon after. I breathed out slowly, trying not to sob.

Stop wallowing in self pity, Samantha, I mentally yelled at myself. I covered my face with one hand, the other still holding the wedding ring that was on the chain around my neck. I wondered what Nate would think of this. Ghouls and synths and my actually using the guns he would tell me so much about from his time in war. If anything, he should have been the one to survive. He was the one who had military training. I was only a lawyer, for god's sake.

A sob hitched my shoulders and I bit my lip. I looked into the fire from behind the desk I sat at. The flames were bright and held back some of my tears. I tried not to think of anything. Not Nate, or Shaun, or even where I was. Focus on the fire. But trying not to think about anything only made you think more.

I hadn't noticed that the ghoul's snoring had stopped a while ago. I don't know how long his coal colored eyes were on me. He sat up and that was the time I realized he was awake. I stood up quickly, turning my face away from him. "Ah, sorry if I woke you." I cringed when my voice cracked.

"What's wrong, sister?" He stood up while asking, but I could still feel his eyes on me.

"Nothing. I think it's your turn to take watch now. Let me know if you hack the terminal. There are mentats next to it." I rigidly walked to my bed roll, past Hancock, keeping my head down.

Hancock snorted. "I always was a mentat kind of ghoul. Makes me feel intellectual," he joked, trying to lighten the mood. I didn't reply and he said nothing after that. Sleep never came to me, but I kept my eyes closed and my back to the fire.