True direction

Memories

*Disclaimer- i don't own Once Upon a Time or any of it's characters.
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"So are you ever gonna tell me why you don't want Tinkerbell to help us?" Emma asked trying to break the brunette out of whatever she was thinking about. Regina looked up at her from her place on the fallen tree and she gave Emma a death glare. "You should know by now that, that look doesn't work on me." Emma said, not so much as faised by the look.

"It is not something I wish to discuss Miss Swan." This time it was Emma's turn to give the death glare and much to Regina's surprise she was rather good at it. "Damn it Regina we just went over this! My name is EMMA not Miss Swan." Emma spat rather harshly getting up and walking towards the other woman and she sighed and sat down next to her.

"Why do you hate me so much?" Emma asked quietly secretly look at the brunette. Regina was taken aback by Emma's words. 'Do I hate her?' she thought. Lately she wasn't sure what she felt for the blonde but she knew that it wasn't hate, but then what was it? For the past 28 years Regina has held conversations with few people let alone spent quantity's of time with them like she and Emma had over the past few months. "I... I don't hate you Emma." Regina's voice was small and if Emma wouldn't have been so close to her she wouldn't have heard it.

Emma snorted a laugh, "You coulda fooled me." She said finally looking away from the captivating woman. Regina's expression was blank, that perfectly sculpted mask she has used for gods only know how many years, was placed upon her face.

"When... When you spend almost 30 years alone, speaking to only one person outside of work, only one person who would willingly hold a conversation with you and spend time with you, and being married to a king that didn't love you and not speaking to anyone because he kept you inside the castle at all times, and growing up with a mother that didn't love you and abused you on a daily basis and made you feel irrelevant and unworthy to be around anyone or be loved by anyone, you get rather good at pushing people away." Regina said smalley. Her voice cracked somewhere in the middle of that and its a good thing Regina's head was down because she had tears in her eyes. She hasn't talked about any of this with anyone before.

Emma's heart was breaking for the beautiful woman beside her. She knew what it was like to be abused and unwanted and not loved. As a kid in the foster system she always ended up with families who didn't really want her, they only wanted the money that came with her. She had spent days without eating, being abused in every sense of the word. Without thinking she wrapped her arms around Regina and pulled her closer to her body.

Regina tensed in her arms, not use to being touched by anyone but Henry or Graham. Without thinking Regina tried to pull out of Emma's grasp but Emma wasn't having any of that, she tightened her hold on the brunette and finally for the first time in over 28 years, Regina let herself walls crumble, and for the first time in her life, she let herself be vulnerable in front of someone. The tears started to flow down Regina's cheeks in hot streaks and they just kept coming.

She cried for the life she use to have with Daniel and for the life she could have had with him. She cried for her mother and for her father, wishing they would have loved her like she deserved. She cried because Henry was somewhere with Pan in Neverland doing only gods know what.

She cried because she was feeling things she shouldn't be for someone she shouldn't feel for.

Emma held tighter to her pulling her even closer and she ran a hand up and down Regina's back and she whispered soothing things to her telling her that everything would be okay and that she wasn't going to leave her. "I'm sorry Emma." Regina's voice was thick with tears and she didn't move from her spot between Emma's shoulder and neck, the tears were still coming.

"It's okay sweetie, it's okay to cry everyone does it, and everyone needs someone to be there for them, I'll be here for you Regina, and I won't leave. I promise." Regina's arms snaked around Emma's waist and she hugged her back and for the first time in a long time Regina felt safe, and... dare she say she even felt loved. Regina let the feeling's was over her finally accepting the feeling's that she has been trying to push away for weeks. Regina let herself feel the love coming from the blonde and Regina let herself feel the love she had for the blonde.

In that moment it was like time stopped, behind Regina's eyelids she could see everything from the past 28 years, but they weren't her memories. She saw a little blonde girl sitting in a dark room crying because she didn't have a family. She saw the same blonde girl lying in a bed, her ribs protruding from her small body. She saw all the different foster families the blonde had ever been with, and then she saw the one event from Emma's past that makes her cry even harder and a gasp to leave her lips. Emma's teenage self, who couldn't have been older than 16 was pushed onto a bed by a man that was twice her size and who knows how old, "No please don't." She heard Emma's voice scream and whimpers escaped her mouth but the man didn't stop. She saw that after that event Emma ran away from the system and that's why she didn't finish high school as a teenager. She saw when and how she met Henry's father and everything that happened with them and why Emma ended up in jail. She saw Emma in a hospital bed giving birth to Henry and she saw her give him up. But now Regina understood why. Everything about the blonde was clicking into place and made complete sense to her. she saw how Emma lived her life after she was released from jail, she watched Emma take down criminal after criminal in her bail bonds days, and she saw and felt how Emma felt when Henry showed up at her door. The event's led to Storybrooke and she witnessed the first meeting of herself and the blonde, she could feel Emma's heart pick up speed at the sight of the brunette and she watched as the memories of all the fights they had and all the fun memories with Henry, flashed behind her eyes. She saw Emma's whole life and she felt everything that the blonde had felt, but what came as a shock to the brunette was that Emma never loved anyone truly until she met Henry.

The memories led to this very moment and how Emma was feeling and when Regina had thought that Emma's hug held love she had no idea just how much love was behind it. The images stopped and she opened her eyes but she didn't move, she was too afraid to look at the blondes face, 'what if she saw all my memories as well?' Regina started to panic. Emma hadn't moved for a few seconds and Regina was starting to worry, so against her better judgement she pulled back and set her gaze upon Emma's face. Emma's eyes were glazed over but the look on her face made Regina even more worried. She knew that her past was despicable and horrid and she saw that reflected on Emma's face.

So Regina did what she did best, she untangled herself from the blonde and she ran, she ran away from the impending heart break that she knew would come, she didn't want Emma to look at her the way everyone else did, she wanted Emma to love her for who she was now and not who she used to be. Regina glanced behind herself but she couldn't see Emma anymore, she didn't know how far she had ran but she slowed down to a walk and just kept walking.

No long after she had stopped running and started walking she heard a noise coming from the direction that she ran from, preparing herself for anything she had a fireball in place in her hand but nothing ever came, and the next thing Regina knew she was on the ground and the world around her was becoming dark and then nothing.