Since the moment we walked through the door it was a tension and sadness that ran through the house, it didn’t feel like home. My family members were all gathered in the living with my mom crying in the middle. I felt the tears coming, I never lost nobody so close to me even though I didn’t live with them anymore how was I going to lose my dad? The man figure that had protected me for so many years, The man that was suppose to walk me down the aisle? What if that never happened.. That night was hard, my mom didn’t want us to see my dad yet because she thought we needed sleep just as much as I thought she did too. I heard my mom cry all night and my sister slept in my room. I thought she was sleeping until I heard her cracky yet soft voice. ‘Do you think dad deserved this, cause you know?’ ‘No one deserves death, but what he did was wrong and I kinda wish we said something’ ‘Me too, but you know mom’s heart woulda been broken and she’s always stressed out’ ‘I know but I don’t know, doesn’t she deserve to know. I realized they could be taken from us anyday’ I heard her start crying again and all I could was hug her tightly. How was I suppose to feel sorry for a man that took my childhood and ruined my sisters life? I know he’s my blood, but there’s some things I wonder about too much. I started seeing the sun and realized I didn’t sleep at all. My mind was so distracted with everything that was going on that I forgot to charge my phone, I got up charged it and decided to start the day and take a shower. When I got out, I checked for any messages from Justin. There was 30 missed calls and 50 texts.. I quickly called back and right away heard him ‘Cat there’s a problem, have you looked outside?’ ‘Outside? What are you talking bout?’ I went to go look and saw the problem that was going to cause drama all over. People with big cameras and vans and news stations. I stopped paying attention, trying to connect everything together. ‘I’m so sorry baby, I woulda never thought they would follow you. I’m sorry, I’m so stupid I shoulda went with you. I should be doing something. I’m so so sorry…Cat?’ I felt my eyes watering up and I felt my voice cracking but I knew it wasn’t Justins fault. ‘No babe, nothing is your fault. I just don’t get it why me?’ ‘Uhmm not to sound self-centered but everyone knows you’re Justin Biebers girlfriend now..’ I swear I always forget how famous is. ‘Oooh yeah I forgot. I needa go I’ll talk to you la...’ Someone was on the other line and it was the no other than my mom. I didn’t even get to say hello before she started yelling at me in English and Spanish, she even used my whole name. The last thing she said was when I knew I was in big trouble. ‘I’m coming home right now and you just wait..’ I broke down. I called Justin and told him to just sing to me, he started humming and I felt way better. I closed my eyes and pretended I was back in his strong arms protecting me.
Right away the arguing started. My mom was sitting across from me in the living room, I was shaking terribly but she needed to hear what I had to say. ‘Catalinna, I don’t know what’s gotten into you. It’s that boy, he’s changed you. You always answered my phone and the past few days it’s like you disappeared that’s why I called your sister. You were out partying? With your so called new boyfriend? At his house, I bet you do drugs now. You’re probably high right now! Then the next day you’re out with him in front of everybody just letting him touch you, what happened to the classy Catalinna I raised? Not only that but now that you’re family needs you the most you bring all these people to my house trying to get pictures of everything..If anything terrible happens to your dad, I blame you’ those were the words that I just couldn’t take anymore. ‘No don’t try to blame this on me. Justin cares bout me more than you ever did. All you cared about was how my grades were and how responsible I was. All my life I was the good daughter but I’m tired of keeping everything in and letting you walk all over me. I’m 19, I can legally do whatever I feel like doing. And when it comes to dad , maybe he does deserve what’s coming to him..’ She didn’t let me finish the sentence before she slapped me straight across the face. That was the first time my mom ever hit me and I was done. I ran upstairs and she called after me but all I could think about was how I ruined everything. I grabbed what I could and started running towards the door. My sister had already woken up but didn’t really know what was going on. My mom tried stopped me before I walked out but then I said ‘He ruined our lives and you don’t care, he touched us and that’s why I’m so scared of everything. That’s why rose is the way she is because of him ALL BECAUSE OF HIM’ It slipped out my mouth but she let me go after and I saw the silent tears start streaming down her face. I drove for what seemed like forever, I pulled in at park and just let everything out. It was like my body had completely shut down and I couldn’t think right about anything. What if me and Justin weren’t meant to be? What if everything was a big mistake? What if it’s all my fault that happened with my dad? What if I was the one that ruined my sisters life? I needed to know these questions before it was too late.. I entered the hospital without any hesitation but I think it was the adrenaline rushing through me. The nurse led me to his bedside, he looked so peaceful and calm. My dad was never like that he always had to be doing something or stressing about problems.’Dad I’m sorry for every time I didn’t listen to you. I love you so much and now you’re just gonna leave without a goodbye or nothing and you’re leaving mom. You know she needs you and there’s so many things you have a job for. I would love for you to meet Justin, he’s amazing and you would get along with him so well. Christmas is coming up and you need to be there. It’ll never be the same, you need to stay please.’ As I was saying this I felt like maybe it would change something or God would listen and help some way. Someone touched my shoulder and said ‘We all need you dad. Although you made mistakes we forgive you and we want you to come back..’ My sister stood next to me and held my hand. We both fell to our knees and started crying. My mom came in and stood behind us she just kept repeating ‘I’m sorry, I’m so sorry’ This wasn’t the best way to end the argument but for once I felt free. I didn’t have to worry, I knew my dad was sorry and me and my sister were strong enough to get through all this.
