Once and Forever

Chapter 5; An Angel?

"An angel?"

"Yes. An angel." He huffs annoyed and walks on. "You know, those creatures with wings and shit." I must really get on his nerves.

"Okay. If that's true... Shouldn't we have.. Like wings or something?" I asked still not convinced.

"Our wings are hidden unless needed or called forward. You can call it a... security mechanism."
He explained after sitting down on a bench near us. I sat next to him, keeping in mind to have a good distance between us, so I'm able to flee and get away if danger occurs. You never know, right?

"Are you saying I could stand up and yell: 'Wings! Come out, come out where ever you are!' And they'll appear out of thin air?" I snorted, not believing him.

"Yes, of course. Because you're playing Hide and Seek with your wings!" You could hear his sarcasm as clear as glass in his voice. "No, it needs more than that. And it needs a lot of practice."

"Can you teach me?" I ask, curious if I could call upon the wings, which manifested the night I died.

"No." His short one-syllable answer came so unexpected I almost recoiled.

"No? Why not?" I ask masking my hurt. Why do I always have to convince him? I already had to talk him over to tell me what's been going on with me. Well honestly I still don't know what's going on, but I thought with his help, I'll find out sooner than later. He must really not like me.

"Because I'm not the right man to do so."

"Not vague at all." Now it was me using sarcasm. But seriously. "Okay let's start over, 'cause we totally skipped the introduction -"

"Oh you've noticed, chee. That took you long."

Ignoring his remark I say, "I'm Claire." With my hand stretched out I wait for him to grab and shake it. With some hesitation he takes my hand into his and shakes it.

"I'm Tyler."

"It's nice to meet you Tyler."

"You sure?"

"Yes, you're the first person I've talked to in four months. It feels great! Honestly, I already thought I'm going to die again. I've been feeling so weak the last week, I thought I'm going to disappear any day now."

"Yeah, that's because you weren't around other angels. We feed from each others energy. It's not "deadly" or whatever you want to call it" He makes air quotation marks with his fingers and carries on with explaining. "But it makes you weak as you have noticed." He stops talking and stares at me. I can see he's wondering about something, so I gave him some time to form his sentence. In the meanwhile I start to examine him better. He has beautiful skin and his black hair is long enough to fall across his forehead. The grey of his eyes are so bright, it looks as if his eyes got washed out. If I look real closely I can see blue flecks spread around his pupil. Wait a second... real closely... OH MY GOD, I've leaned  in so far we're only a few centimeters apart.

With this realisation I immediately shrank back and turn away from him. My cheeks are heating up and I definitely don't want him to see me blush.

"Can I ask you something?" He asks and touches my shoulder with hope I'll turn back to look at him.

Can I look into these beautiful eyes again without thinking about our nearness just seconds ago? I'll only know if I try.

I turn back around and slowly raise my eyes to meet his.

"What do you want to know?" Surprisingly my voice is strong and controlled. This gives me back some strength, so I sit up straighter and square my shoulders. I have control. I am strong.

"Why aren't you with the other angels?"

"Ehhm." Okay, I lost my cool again. I have no clue what he meant. Isn't he an angel? I mean I'm with him right now, so why is he asking. "I'm not so sure what you're asking me. I'm here with you, aren't I?"

"You know what I mean..." He states with a pressing voice, expecting me to cut out with the smart answers and give him an honest one instead.

"I'm sorry but I sincerely have no idea what your talking about. Till I've met you, I downright suspected myself to be the only ghost existing in this strange afterlife."

Now it was his turn to be surprised. It looks like he did not await this answer. "Then how did you die?"

"Why do you want to know?" This is almost too personal for my taste. Still, all I know about him is his first name and that he supposedly is an angel just like me.

"If I know what happened that day, I could maybe find out why you haven't moved on."

"Moved on? As in I'm stuck? Is this not the afterlife I thought it was?"

"Yes, move on. No, you're not stuck. And to your last question, I don't know what you thought it was so I can't help you there. So are you going to tell me your story or what?"

And so I tell him. I tell him everything. From the night my parents were killed to the days I've spent in the orphanage, hopeless and broken, waiting for my life to end. I tell him of the days I've met my best friends and how I started to care for them. The story goes on to the night of my death and how, when I saw my best friends suffering, I came back down and spent day after day trying to reach them somehow, to let them know, that I'm still here. I'm still alive.

"Wow. That's one huge story. And it explains a lot." He goes through his hair with his right hand and sighs.

Yeah, I come with baggage.

There is a long pause where nobody says a word. Tyler's analysing my history and I go back to wandering about his previous question.

"Will you explain now what you meant with me not being with other angels?"

"Yes of course. Normally, after someone dies, he or she gets carried away with their newly gained wings. At the gate you get welcomed by our guard. He checks, that no intruders enter our home."

"So we just live there and do nothing the whole day long?"

"No. We get jobs and start our new life as an angel. But you should know; not everyone has the gene to become an angel. This gene can be passed along through the family or appear randomly in a new born child." He stops talking and glances at his watch. "Look I need to go. It was nice meeting you and good luck finding your way back home, Claire. I know they've been awaiting you."

He kisses my right cheek and stands up. I start saying my goodbye but he has already vanished into thin air. Gone.

How am I ever going to find out what I should do to get to this place he calls home. My home. But I thought my home is here with my two best friends, whom I consider as family.

Thinking about them I realise the time that had passed and worry. Are they still in town or did they return to the orphanage? I should maybe just go ahead and wait for them at the eerie mansion. And it's maybe also for the best to spend some time alone to think through all those new questions Tyler gave me.