Dear Diary

~23rd September 2013~

Today has been hell. I went to school today and had to go see the counsellor. She gave me an anxiety test and told me to make situations out of 10. All of my answers were 10.

While in the room, my Spanish teacher and deputy of head of Sixth form came in and noticed how many 10s I had and how anxious I was. He already knows that I suffer from it, but neither him nor the counsellor realised how bad it is.

I didn't tell them about home. They'll tell someone.

My counsellor also told me off because I'm 'starving myself'. It's just because I don't like to eat at school and I'm too busy in the morning.

The only upside was that my History teacher was really nice to me and told me that I have amazing qualities that anyone would be lucky to have.

He doesn't know about home either.

I spoke to my friends, and I think they're getting fed up with me talking about my problems and not doing anything about them.

They don't really understand how I feel.

I'm kinda stuck with what to do at the moment.

I just feel alone and afraid.

They started on me again last night.

I asked for help in Spanish and my mum flipped because she gave up 30 minutes of her time.

They then had a go at me for having my music on.

And then because I, apparently, left my mum to have a fit when I was 8 years old.

They're trying to come up with anything to make me feel bad.

It's working.

I pretty much hate myself.

My counsellor transfered me to a website for the mentally unstable.

I'm not mentally unstable, I'm just confused and lost.

I can't help it.