Good Girl Gone Bad

Chapter Three: So Much Pain

Author's Note: I feel so bad for not writing in forever, but I have been pretty busy. I'm on a soccer team, two choirs, voice lessons every week, church two days a week, not to mention school and homework. Yay me, right? Hah, nope. I've also gotten sick three times in the last three weeks. Yeah, so I think I should be excused for my disappearances. 

Attention!: Make sure to check out the Chapter Playlist at the end of the chapter to see what songs I listened to/go with this chapter. They could explain any questions you may have. 

Good Girl Gone Bad

Chapter Three: So Much Pain

Bella

"We wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, we wish you a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year!" 

As you can tell, I was in an excellent mood. 

And I was also singing Christmas carols in the middle of October. 

I was clearly a cool kid. 

I pulled into Jake's house, where he was waiting with an annoyed look on his face. There was something else in his eyes that I couldn't quite place, but with Jake, it was best to just wait till he was ready to talk. 

I stepped out of my Jeep and slammed the car door behind me. I placed a kiss on the shiny black hood as I always did before I moved towards my hulking werewolf best friend. 

"No call, Bells? Seriously? I thought you'd finally been mugged or raped or something!" 

Jacob thought I was "ridiculous and stupid" for sleeping in my Jeep. 

I thought he was being an idiot. 

What was wrong with my Jeep? 

Nothing. 

Absolutely nothing. 

"I'm sorry. Did you want me to wake you up at 3 AM? Didn't think so, moron," I replied, leading the way to his garage, where we spent all our time. 

"Just...I get worried, Bells. You're hu-"

I froze. If he was going to say what I thought he was going to say, I'd murder the bastard. 

"I'm what? Human? Is that what it is, Jake? Are you like him? Like the man, no, the boy, that left me alone in the woods at night? Are you like the person who treated me like glass? Like dirt? Like nothing? Like a distraction?" I was working myself into hysterics. 

Jacob was immediately on the defensive. 

"What? No, Bella, I could never be like him? How could you compare me to that bloodsucking leech? I just don't want you to get hurt!" 

The funny thing about me was that I could easily just shoot or punch or beat someone into oblivion, but when it came to words, I was a hot mess. 

Now, words that I could twist to make feel like I was shooting or punching or beating someone, I was an expert. 

"Don't want me to get hurt? Don't want me to get hurt? I have nearly died more than five times, I was shot more times than I have fingers, I was deserted by the love of my life, I saw my friends and family die before my eyes, I lost my parents and my home, I live in my car, and I have nothing left to live for and you don't want me to get hurt? Guess what, Jake?! It's too late. It's too fucking late. I'm already hurt. I'm broken, Jake! And you just can't fix me!"