The Office Meets Parks and Rec

Scene-6 The Meeting

I've been overwhelmed with the amount of support I've received. Because of you all, I've gotten to 1000 reads! I didn't ever expect to get so many. Because of all of the support, I've decided to continue writing this episode. Stay tuned for more scenes! -xoxo Jenna.

Michael: Alright everybody! Simmer down! Simmer down! Party's over! I know...I know! Don't everybody complain at once now.

(Everyone stares blankly at Michael)

Michael: All disagreements aside, let's head over into the meeting room and discuss the real reasons you've come here to Scranton.

Tom: Parties!

Ron: Hooters!

Leslie: Campaigning!

Michael: No, business. Although, I do like the idea of going to Hooters. Everyone, into the conference room now.

(To cameras) Michael: These people from Pawnee are uh...very interesting...uh clients so to call them. I enjoy their company. I really do and I like the idea of sponsoring some lady's city campaigning. It would be great for a city to elect a female president or whatever she's running for and I am glad to be a part of that, it's just these people need to get their priorities straight. I'm a simple guy, a smart guy, but a simple one. Okay scratch that. I'm a business man. Yeah I'm all about fun, but the bottom line is that at the end of the day, I run a business, not a park. I'm a business man who is too advanced for business school. I enrolled at Scranton Business School and they rejected me and said that they didn't think their school was for me which is just a modest way of saying I'm too advanced for their program. Basically what I'm trying to say is that I want to do business with these people, but it's going to take a lot of patience, something I thankfully have lots of. It's just I think that these Parks and Rec people have spent too much time sliding down slides and swinging on swings to know how to do real business.

Tom: Hey Kelly, if we sit in the back, we can still make out.

Kelly: Giggles loudly to make sure Ryan hears.

Ryan (To cameras): I'm not jealous of Tom...Stop! I'm really not! Ugh!

(Scene change to conference room)

(Everyone finds a chair except Jerry)

Jerry: Um...is there an extra chair somewhere or something?

Michael: Um...you know what? Um...you can sit...on the floor in the back.

Jerry: Sighs

Michael: Alright ladies, gentlemen, and whatever Jerry is, I'm so glad you could come out here to discuss business with us. We sure do hope we can come to an agreement. Not only do we hope that we can be civil with each other, but we hope that we can become closer. Friends even.

(Camera pans to Tom and Kelly making out)

Michael: That said, let's talk business now. So, paper. We all love it. It comes from trees. White. Thin.

Ron: Just get to the point already!

Michael: Right. Okay so we are planning to sponsor you. We will provide you with flyers for free, however...

Leslie: What's the catch? There's always a catch!

Michael: We want 20% of all funds made through your election.

Leslie: What!

Ron: Huh! This should be interesting.

Leslie: We have zero dollars right now! With that, we can't afford to run. Please, Pawnee is a small, poor town. Can't we find some other way to pay you?

Michael: Well...we want a Dunder-Mifflin Paper office in your Parks and Rec. building.

Ron: Absolutely not! There's a reason why it's called the Parks and Rec. building. Because it's a building. For Parks and Rec!

Ron (to cameras): At first I thought he was joking. Then I realized that his entire life is a joke. There's no way we are bringing these obnoxious swines into our office. The only reason I came here is because I was promised some good eggs. I cannot wait to get away from these people.

Michael: Fine then! No deal!

Ron: (scoffs) Come on! You act like you're the only paper company around.

Michael: We are the only one's doing it for free. All we want is an office in your Parks and Rec. building to expands our business.

Pam: I have a compromise. How about you buy us a new printer and a new computer chair and we'll supply you with all the paper you could ever need.

Leslie: Well, Jerry is retiring soon so you can take his printer and his chair. Would that work Michael?

Michael: (Hesitantly) Uh...yes.

Michael: (To cameras) What in the world does Pam think she's doing! I still have more haggling to do. You always have to start high and then creep your way down little by little. I remember I went to the hardware store once and I picked up a hammer for $7.50. I finagled my way into paying $8.50 but get this! I got the warranty! If I ever broke that thing, I would've gotten a new one for free. I tried so hard to break that hammer, but I only ended up with a smashed driveway and a broken toe nail. Still the best deal I've ever gotten.

Michael: Fine, deal! Just can we go get food already because I'm starting to go insane from hunger!

Ron: Pfft you were already insane!

Michael: All for going to Hooters say I!

Pam and Jim: I think we'll pass.

Stanley: So I can leave right?

Creed: I'm banned from there.

Ron: *whispers Eggs!

Donna: Sure why not!

Dwight: Those all weren't "I"!

Angela: That place disgusts me so I want no part in that. I refuse to be around women who disrespect their bodies like that.

Tom: I'll go! (As he holds Kelly's hand)

Ron: What is this? We've only been here 2 hours and you've already picked up a girl?

Andy: Oh please, Tom isn't strong enough to pick up a girl.

April: Ha good one! And I'm so in! I used to work at a Hooters. Then they made me dance. Apparently ballet isn't the type of dancing they meant. What! I used to do ballet okay!

Ron: Okay...can we just go already. The eggs aren't going to eat themselves!

Michael: So who's coming Ron, Donna, Dwight, Kelly, me, Andy, and April?

Ron: Who cares who's going? Let's just go already!

Michael: Okay! Okay! Relax! Breath. We're leaving!

Ron: Finally you've made yourself useful.

(They all leave and turn off the lights.)

(Jerry wakes up from the back dazed and confused)

Jerry: Where am I?

(End scene)