Average Joe

The Wheels On The Bus Go

So it was eventually time to leave and after I drank a gallon of Starbucks I felt wide awake. There's a Starbucks pretty close to my house and since I'm as basic as they get, of course it's my favourite coffee shop. You might be a little concerned about me for ordering the type of girly drink I ordered but that's because I was supposed to be a female protagonist, somehow that's the only cliche that the author missed.

My bus rolls around and I get on to find Josh

and Brittney

and Mickenzie

and literally everyone else that's a main character who goes to my school.

It's almost like we all live on the same street. But of course that's not it. The writer wouldn't do that, she's not that stupid. The reason we all are on the same bus is because we live in a small town, everyone knows each other. Everyone either wants to date each other or run each other under a bus. Sometimes both.

Since I'm the narrator, I've got your back. Lemme tell you about everyone who has a part to play in my story. I'm not judging them! I'm just an observer, a shy, quiet, lone observer. My silent observation is another quirk which makes the girls find me " mysterious".

First, we have Brittney, I'd run her under a bus. She's the queen bee of our school. Head cheer leader. Perfect blonde hair. She's dating Mike, more on him soon. Every guy wants to date her, I do too. But I know I don't stand a chance because I am a shy, quiet, mysterious boy who's rumored to be a werewolf, so I act like I'm uninterested in her and that I'm too busy spending my youth "discovering myself".

Right beside her are tweedle dee and tweedle dum. Dee and Dum for short. I wish I knew their names but they don't really have much of a part in my life except for standing or sitting beside Brittney.

Dee is a person of color. The writer just threw her in to make the book look diverse and intellectual.

Dum, is the dumb one. Last time I interacted with her she asked me what's an "orb". Well, it serves me right for narrating situations out loud when I should really be doing them in my mind and then again, I don't think many teens use the word "orbs" to describe eyes.

We've got Mickenzie, who's a shy, quiet, nerd, with glasses on. She has only one friend. That friend happens to be imaginary. But hey, no judgments. I mean I narrate my life 24/7 so who am I to talk? I'd date Mickenzie, she's a nice girl. But I won't show interest in her. In fact, I ignore her existence all the time. This one time I actually looked at her, just to see what happens.

She passed out.

Why don't I give the nice girl my attention? Good question!

I settle down next to Josh.

My main man. My home bro. I wouldn't run him over with a bus but I wouldn't date him either. I guess what we have is a pure bromance. He too, is a person of colour. But we already filled the necessity for one with Dee so he's here to full fill other cliches.

Josh is the coolest guy in school. So naturally you would expect someone like him to be best friends with someone like me. Sure we don't have anything in common and barely have a real conversation but that doesn't stop the writer.

Some might view me as one of Josh's tweedle dee or dum. I don't really care about that because I don't care about what others think of me. As a shy, skinny teenage boy I'm very self-assured. Not to mention that my self-esteem issues have pretty much been eradicated by teenage girls swooning over my blond locks.

Ah yes, my blond locks. They gracefully fall over my chiseled cheekbones. My blue orbs, that remind one of the ocean- ah, we're at school already. Time to get off the bus. 

A/N: This chapter is dedicated to SuspiciousChicken. Spent all day reading their book on cliches. Thanks for the book.