Average Joe

My First Date

It's the last day of second week of school and all the Starbucks I've had has helped me adjust my sleep schedule. Dr.Gianna and I haven't had many sessions. I've just been bombarded with homework that I tried to cope with in my free periods. Mrs.Moore sure loves to give us surprise quizzes.

"Josh, wait up," he's with Mike, Brittney's boyfriend.

I stumble over to my friend. Mike gives me a nod. I'm sure he's a nice guy, just a victim of circumstance. The writer decides our personalities. Then he continues to ignore me. We walk down the hallways as I try to maintain my mysterious vibe. I spot Doctor staring at us from the corner. She signals me to come over and so I do.

"Yes?"

"You're going on a date with Mickenzie?" Her face as expressive as it can get.

"Yes."

"And you didn't tell me?" She grabs me by the shoulders.

"Yes."

"You asked her out?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"Yes ugh I mean because she was nice to me, like I told you."

"Why didn't you tell me about this sooner?" Her hands on her head.

"Oh I don't know, maybe we were trapped inside a room and I was having a panic attack." I say in an obvious tone.

"Ok, accepted. But you can't go on this date."

"Why not?"

"This is so cliche, the whole mysterious guy notices the girl next door type of thing."

"It's just one date."

"You're not going. You need to do this for the sake of the book. Don't you know about the butterfly effect? Anything you do can catastrophically change all of our lives. You're the protagonist. Think like one."

"How did you know about our date anyway?"

"Spotted Mickenzie talking to herself."

"She's talking to her imaginary friends."

"How do you know that?"

"I'm the protagonist, so I know." I shrug.

"Just promise me you're not going." She makes an x shape with her hands.

"See ya."

I am going on this date. Micky deserves a chance.

I rush up to Josh and Mike who seem to have not noticed my absence.

We walk into our first class for the day.

I stare at the clock and it seems to have frozen. Time is moving slower than ever.

I manage to make it alive by the end of the day and I have two hours before I need to meet Micky. I tell Josh about our date on the bus ride back home. He seems to not be aware of a girl named Micky in our school. Which I don't find odd, even though Micky rides the same bus, she's a little too unpopular. Micky seems to be asleep in the seat right ahead of us.

Her hair is a mess and I think it would be a good contrast against mine. Maybe this is a romantic comedy. The opposites attract. I've never been on a date before. I know it sounds odd, considering all the girls are into me but I just haven't really been doing much until this book started.

I get off the bus and get to my room. Lucas walks in and asks me if I wanna play a video game with him and I promise him I will later.

"Why not now?" He sits down on my bed.

"Because I have a date in one and a half hour."

"With whom?"

"A girl from school."

"Can I come?"

"No." I need time away from this kid.

"So you're picking out clothes?"

"Yes, it's my first date after all."

"Moooom, daaad, Joe likes a girrrrrrl." He yells as he walks out of my room.

Great.

My parents rush into my room and ask me if they need to have the talk with me. I try to get them to leave as fast as I can.

The second they do, my phone rings. It's an unknown number.

"Hello?"

"Joe, this is Gianna. You're going on that date aren't you?"

"No way. That would be too cliche. I'm not. Nope. Not me."

"Quit it. What are you wearing?"

"How did you get my number? How did you know the date is today?"

"It's not hard to get information from a lonely girl with imaginary friends."

"I hate you."

"Watch it, now what are you going to wear?"

I never thought going on a date would involve my psychologist's advice.

"I don't know. A jacket and some bracelets. Some black bottoms and a white T-shirt."

"You can't wear that Joe." Her voice slow, as if she's trying not to panic.

"Then?"

"Do you own a leotard?"

"Excuse me?" I drop the clothes I intend to wear onto my bed.

"Do you own a wedding gown? Maybe wear that with some floaties and add in some clown makeup."

"Excuse me?"

"Joe, this is serious. You need to wear anything that makes you stand out. I don't think there are many fictional boys who wear what I just told you on the first date. You need to do anything to keep yourself from being cliche."

"Yeah ok, floaties, leotards and makeup it is." I hang up the phone.

I decide to take a shower before changing. I get into the bathtub and start spraying AXE body spray onto myself. After twenty minutes of non stop spraying, I get out and put on my already chosen clothes. I shake my head as I laugh at the idea of myself in a leotard and floaties.

I get out of my house and walk to our chosen meet up spot.

The Starbucks right next to my house.

What better location to date? I suggested it of course.

Before I make my way into the door, I feel attacked by some form of liquid. I wince and I turn around to see Dr.Gianna standing behind me.

I underestimated this woman.

She quickly sprayed my face as I tried to get away from her.

"What are you doing?"

"I knew you wouldn't wear what I told you to. You're not serious about being a savior yet. So I had to take things in my own hands." She kept spraying.

"What do you mean? What is this?" I try to cover my face but I know it's too late.

"Body paint baby!" she sounded hyped.

I distanced myself from my current situation to ask myself, " Did she self medicate or something?" Did she overdose on anything? What's happening.

"You're covered in purple paint. Good luck on your date Joe. I only did this to set you aside from the rest. No hard feelings. But you can't be cliche. This was my job, as your sidekick. You'll understand in the future."

"I hope Micky likes guys with purple skin and hair." I mumble to myself as I accept my new life and walk in.

I couldn't stand her up. Plus, how bad could it be? I know some parts of my body are still left uncovered.