In the Darkness

VII: Favor

Days pass quite fast and many things changed along with the seasons. Its winter now and things got a little more complicated. I get sick sometimes due to the cold and I got more and more weary as my due date near. As the snow started sticking onto the ground, all Kegare attacks ceased. This doesn't make me happy, I know for sure they're planning something big, a master plan to kill me and my child. The cold and tension among my company makes me restless.

"Why, you look pathetic Adashino Benio. Pregnancy does suit you though, you know you're always meant to be weak and useless. You're nothing but a container for the real opponent." Kamui says slowly, lazily.

"Shut up." was all I can say.

"Tell me if it's not true then. I gave you those legs so you would be stronger, to at least be on the same level as the boy but still you die easily without him by your side. They only need you to carry the miko, after that you'll be a disposable item. I want to hear your plans after you give birth Adashino Benio, tell me."

His words crawls under my skin into my very soul. He'll get nothing by just merely hurting me with words so I know he's just stating the fact. I don't have any plans when they are done with me. Rokuro will be fighting alongside with my child who will be under the care of the guardians and Arima. I don't have a role to play, I'll be left out.

"I don't... know." He stepped closer to me until our faces were inches apart, I can smell the evil off his skin.

"I want to help you. Consider this a peace offering after what I did to your parents." His right hand was raised in the air forming a claw-like appearance with his fingers then with one swift motion, he buried it in my stomach not caring about the obstruction within my womb. Like a sharp knife through butter, his hand appeared through my back leaving me unable to breathe. "Without the miko, they can't let go of you just yet, you're welcome." He whispers to my ear.

I screamed because it's all I can think of doing. Everything went black as I felt someone violently shaking me. Everyone was here in my room, Subaru, Arima, Seigen, Shimon, Kinu, Rokuro, Kinoko even Tatara, all staring at me. I just realized that I am catching my breath.

"Kamui." I managed to say.

"A nightmare?" Shimon asked. I can only nod, unwilling to share the details of it.

"Dreams like this usually equivalents to something real." Subaru says. "Arima, let's do a ritual to make sure." They all agreed at once then left the room. "You stay with her" she says to Rokuro. I felt my stomach, no hole made by Kamui's hand. No sign of his unkind favor. I must have been frozen there like a statue until Rokuro held me in his arms.

A bitter laugh came out. "He's right."

"What do you mean Benio?" he asked concern was dominant in his voice. I was so angry with myself for not realizing it earlier. There was no way I could be with this boy and this child after all of this, I'll only get in the way. I was so absorbed with my own fantasies, in my own hope that I believed it would still work out. I pulled away from his hug.

"After all of this Rokuro, I'll be out of your way." I'll be thinking for the rest of my plan. What can I do to fight the loneliness of being away from my child and the man I love? For them, I at least have to try.

"Are you going crazy?" he asks with a funny look in his face.

"Would you like to kiss me Rokuro?" I wanted to know, badly.

He started waving his hands frantically. "Why do you ask such things Benio?"

"Coward." I chuckled bitterly knowing that he'll only do it out of a challenge.

"I'm not. I can easily do it if I like." He says smugly. That's the problem Rokuro, you don't. My depression was a challenge to him so he had to do something to distract me that time we spend the night together. We made love with different purpose in mind and I had thought it was the same. I lay back on my bed pulling the blanket up to my chin ignoring his presence.

"Oy Benio! I don't understand you at all!" he complains, not having a plan to leave.

"Do you regret having this child with me? Do you regret kissing me? Touching me? Living with me?" Silence. "I'm right aren't I?"

"Idiot." I turned to look at him meeting his angry eyes. "I never thought you were such an idiot Benio."

"It's you who don't understand Rokuro. You'll only kiss me if it's a contest so you won't lose. You don't feel the way I do." I blurted out. He was frozen, startled by my outburst.

"You're the stupidest person I know." he says quietly instead of matching my outburst. "Saying that you will get out of my way after all this? You plan on leaving us, your family?" Before I could answer his lips crashed into mine with the same need I have been keeping for a long time. "Kissing you had been a thing on my mind since the day you fell from the sky. I love you idiot, I won't know what to do if you leave." His voice barely audible.

"Do you think they'll let you be with me Rokuro?... After I give birth to the miko my duty is done, they'll be done with a powerless girl like me. I can't fight with you anymore, I will not be a burden." I'm surprised of how hollow my voice is. Maybe, I had come to accept the truth.

"I love you baka! I stayed with you because I want to not because I was being told to. I love you Benio please forget about leaving us!" Rokuro begging me was as rare as a blue moon. His cheeks were damp with tears and I regret making him feel sad.

"I love you Rokuro." Was all I could promise him. We held each other until he drifted to sleep. I stayed awake with one question in mind. "What should I do?"

NOTE: Gosh i can't believe people are actually reading my work. It means so much to me you don't know. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!! Arigato!!! :D