Stints | ✔

Twelve: Live For All the Small Things

"Sometimes people are beautiful.

Not in looks.

Not in what they say.

Just in what they are."

― Markus Zusak

   I cursed immediately when I woke up in the morning.

   Zoey still did it.

   And I still didn't know why she chose to do something so brash.

   That's it.

   I needed to stay in bed. I felt like I couldn't function.

   Why couldn't she just live? She didn't necessarily need to live for me, but she needed to learn to live for herself. She had so much potential. She has so much potential. I didn't understand.

   Laying in bed, I took shaky breaths. Tears were running down my face.

   Mom knocked on the door a couple times, but I didn't respond. Eventually, she walked in.

   "Isaac," she said in a nurturing tone. "What's wrong?"

   "Mom," I began in a whisper. "Leave me alone. I don't feel well."

   Because I didn't look at her, I swear she was frowning. "Isaac, don't be crazy. I made pancakes, and they're good."

   I shrugged the best I could laying down on my side. "I. Don't. Care. Please, just leave me be. I don't want to go to school today."

   She laughed. "Isaac, isn't homecoming week coming up? You don't want to be ill-prepared."

   Ignoring all that Mom said, I asked her something. "Mom, what would you do if someone you cared about, or knew, was contemplating suicide?"

   Mom frowned. "Isaac, is there something you're not telling me?"

   I sat up and looked at my mom. I needed for her to realize that this wasn't about me. It was about Zoey Graves.

   "Mom, it's not me. I'm not talking about myself."

   "Good. Good." She smiled, but still gave a me an earnest and concerned look. "Now is it your girlfriend, Justice? You told me about her bulimia problem in the past, but..."

   I closed my eyes briefly and shook my head. Mom bringing that up kind of made me feel a little frustrated and even sadder, 'cause despite the fact that Justice and I weren't much in love, or whatever you'd like to call it, anymore. I remembered helping her through that. After her parents sent her to get some help for a month last year, everyone at school had kept asking me where she was and why she wasn't coming to school. And I lied to every one and told them that she was on vacation with her parents.

   But who went on vacation again right after spring break?

   I didn't think Peyton knew about that.

   "No, it's this one girl named Zoey. She looks depressed all the time at school, and I saw her crying in her car and stuff like that."

   Mom put her lips in a thin line. "Maybe she was just having a bad day."

   "That's it Mom!" I said with exasperation in my voice. "But this has been going on for some time. I mean, she looks like she could break any moment. When is enough- enough?"

   "Honey, I'm sorry. That came out wrong..."Mom put her hand on my shoulder. "What about this? What if you invite her over for dinner on Saturday? I'm sure I could cook something nice? Does she like baked ziti? Or some fajitas? I've always wanted to try that Mexican rice recipe..."