Chapter One

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"Ah, I love this one!"

"Yeah I know its something you'd really go for."

"Hahah yeah, You know me too well. But I just love works like this, works that portrays a kind world, I've always wanted to live or at least experience that kind of place. To be part of such a world with a warm and soothing atmosphere its my dream I guess."

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I have...

have always been....

always..... always....

wished to be....

a part of that kind of warm atmosphere, enveloping the person who said that about my work.....

Yesterday, I Minami Ai joined in our schools painting contest. I rarely do join on anything neither do I participate on anything. But yesterday, I thought real hard and I came to the thought that I want changes to happen. For me to be part of his world I have to work hard for it.

Amanogawa Kakeru... he's a famous person inside and out of our school... He's good at everything from sports to academics just simply everything... But most of everything that he's good at, my favorite is his amazing painting skills. He can bring pictures alive, its really just amazing, through his works I've learned how to appreciate myself and this world.

My mother and father are both famous painters they're always busy and always traveling. There wasn't a time in my childhood even now that we sat down and had breakfast or lunch and not even dinner together. Not even Christmas or New Year its always just work, work and work. Even on my birthday all they do is send me a package. 

They keep on telling me such lies like "We'll make it up to you." "We promise to be with you next year." Its always just "We're sorry something came up." And I'm always the one who needs to understand. I used to cry a lot about it when I was younger, I always thought to myself that I was an unwanted child, but wasn't that selfish of me!? My parents were both successful and happy with their careers so I shouldn't be a bother, right? As I grew up I just learned to be independent and sooner it was like its just a part of my system, it was never unusual anymore, it didn't hurt anymore well at least not as much. But as I said I don't wanna be selfish, if my parents are happy about that its their dreams and work so I wont stop them. I'll support them! And also on one of the books I've read there was a quote there that says "We we're born alone, so in the end we'll always be alone till our deaths." Well its true we came to this world alone and so we're the only ones who can take care and protect ourselves, whatever would happen its not anyone's fault cause its our life and we're the ones who controls it.

Well that said... since both my parents were painters I guess I got that talent too. I have always been good in arts... Drawing, painting or any other crafts you name it, but I hated it. I always thought my parents were useless, so I never appreciated my talent, it reminded me of how for painting, for their work, they left me all by myself. I hate them so much, and most of all I hated painting so much, if maybe it didn't exist I'll be living happily together with my parents, if it didn't existed I wouldn't be alone. But then again that's just another selfish thought of mine, I never thought I could be so thoughtless and selfish to think in such a way to hate something a lot of people and most of all my parents live for.

From then on I just decided to never do something connected with arts. I just stayed out of sight, I never let anyone knew who my parents were nor did I let anyone know of my talent that I got from them. It was fairly easy to hide myself specially because I was graduating grade school then. Everything was new in High school, the city, the people, the school, and my classmates so yes no one knew... no one ever knew...

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