NinjaGo - Random Stories N' Stuff

Grapefruits and Dungeons & Dragons

Synopsis: The Ghost squad play a little D&D and Wrayth has a Grapefruit... For some reason.

3rd Person POV

Morro laughed heartily as he sat down in his chair. "I'm Dungeon Master for today's Quest."

"Oh no. Every time you send us on a Quest, something bad happens. Like death," Bansha stated. "Like that time you killed Soul Archer."

"I didn't kill him, his roll did. How did you even manage to roll a 2 on a D20, anyway?"

"Bad luck."

"Heard there's no such thing as luck," Ghoultar said.

"But there is," Archer said. "And it is luck that allowed me to revive myself."

"But luck also killed you," Ghoultar said. Archer simply shrugged.

"Hey guys!" Wrayth chirped as he walked in the room, late as usual. "Why is Morro the DM?"

"It's his turn," Bansha plainly stated.

Wrayth sighed. "If my supposedly cursed dice act up on me again, it's your fault."

"The dice are cursed, and I had nothing to do with that."

"They are not cursed," Archer said. "I rolled his D6 once and got a 5."

"Try rolling my D20 if you're so smart," Wrayth retorted playfully.

Archer reached into Wrayth's dice bag, pulled out his twenty-sided die, and rolled it. The number was 17.

"Case closed," Morro said, "Wrayth just can't roll a die properly."

Wrayth sighed. "Can we just get on with it?"

"Okey-dokey," Morro began. "The four of you walk into the small town of Heughingburg—"

"What?" Wrayth laughed.

"—and find an old wizardy-looking dude selling lemonade—"

"I will admit, this is the strangest scenario you have conjured up so far. Congratulations," Archer said.

"—at this old stand. He sees you and waves. 'HELLO! ADVENTURERS!'"

"I'mma go talk to the old dude," Wrayth said.

"Will anyone else go with Wrayth?"

"Sure. Why not," Bansha muttered loudly enough for Morro to hear. Archer and Ghoultar also agreed to see the wizard.

"You four walk up to the old wizard. On closer inspection, he has a long white beard and is wearing a tan straw hat—"

"This guy looks like Sensei Wu," Bansha said.

"—He is also wearing a white Sensei Gi—" Morro was beginning to laugh a little at this point. "—and is holding a bamboo staff. The man says to you, 'Would you mind helping an old Sens—I mean wizard out?"

"May we have your name?" Bansha asks.

"Ah, yes. They call me Wu."

"We just walked into the town of Heughingburg, and met Sensei Wu selling lemonade?" Archer inquired.

"Yep."

"And Wu is now a Wizard?" Ghoultar asked.

"Yep."

"Continue, but please let me keep these last few fragile strands of my sanity," Archer said.

"Wu asks you to go on a quest. 'Ah, yes it seems as though I am too old to retrieve the Realm Crystal myself—'"

"Is this entire quest gonna be stuff that actually happened?"

"Not quite," Morro said. "'—a few adventurers like you four could maybe help and old man out? There's a reward?'"

"What is the reward?" Archer asked.

"'Well, let's see here, how about 3,000 Gold each?'"

"Sure then, we're off!" Wrayth said.

After Morro had explained where to find the Realm Crystal, the four ended up mere steps away from retrieving it before Morro decided to throw a few random orcs into the picture. After their tedious quest, they decided to look around for loot.

Bansha went first. "I am going to look for a spellbook."

"Mmm-kay," Morro said, "Roll a D20."

Bansha rolled the die and ended up with a 7.

"You find a spellbook with moderately average spells in it, but it's lodged into a wall and you can't seem to figure out why or how to retrieve it."

"I try pulling the book out of the wall." Bansha rolls and ends up with a 13.

"You manage to pull the book out only to realize it's missing a few pages."

"Ah, what the heck. I'll take it."

"My turn," Archer spoke. "I want to find some kind of arrow for my bow, preferably enchanted." He rolls an 18.

Morro looks surprised for a moment, then says, "You find a quiver of twelve arrows with an ancient ruin casted onto them. You flick the tip of one on a nearby rat, and the creature immediately perishes from fatal poisoning."

"I cannot refuse that offer." He rolls a 14 this time.

"You pull the quiver over your back, but the arrow you just used to test the enchantment falls into a crack in the floor."

"I still have eleven left," Archer mused.

"Okay, Ghoultar, what'll it be?"

"Hmm... An axe. Why not." He rolls a 1.

"There is an axe handle in sight, but it's on the other side of the room and doesn't have a blade."

"Brilliant."

"Wrayth, what'll it be?"

"Something unexpectedly useful." He managed to roll a 20.

"You find a grapefruit hidden in a holy shrine worshipping some ancient deity. The thing is glowing purple and reeks of magic."

"Mine!" He rolls a 16.

"You grab the fruit, and realize that it has a magic boosting aura that gives +5 to all magic attacks."

Soul Archer is still trying to grasp what just happened. "A magic grapefruit?"

"Yes, a magic grapefruit."

"...why?"

"Because he asked for something unexpectedly useful. I think a magic grapefruit falls into that category."

"This is strange," Archer said.

"That's what happens when I'm the Dungeon Master. Strange things that make no sense."