When Following Your Heart (GxG)

When Taking it Day by Day

I must have actually dozed off after we dropped off Sam and Ryan because the next day I woke up in a very unfamiliar bed with a very unfamiliar dog looking at me. To say I was disoriented was an understatement. I sat up in the bed and immediately regretted it after feeling the headache awaken with me. The small dog with short brown fur and blue eyes looked up at me and barked. The bark sounded adorable and I could tell it was just a puppy.

I threw myself back on the bed not ready to move. The bark must have alerted Alex because she came running up the stairs shortly after.

She looked like something you dream of. She had sweat pants and a sports bra but her wavy hair was out long down her back. Her toned body and tattoos were making my body wake up in all sorts of ways, but I couldn't let myself. I remembered everything last night and I wasn't sure how I felt about it.

She gave me a shy smile and spoke in a low soft voice. "When I imagined you waking up in my bed I never imagined you hung over." She teased.

"Im sure i'm not the first. Wont be that last." I mumbled back.

She gave me a confused look. "Actually you are. I don't let people into my personal space. Iv'e never let a girl sleep over." She was starring out the window as she spoke. Her eyes came back to meet mine. I wasn't sure how to feel or if I even believed her even though something told me I should.

"Look you don't have to lie to me. I know i'm just another girl to you." I sounded a little more ticked off then I intended but part of me still felt disappointed.

"What are you talking about?" She looked truly confused now.

I stood out of the bed and looked her in the eye. " I heard everything last night. Your gunna take me out show me a good time and toss me aside when it's convenient for you." I spat.

A look of realization flashed before her eyes but it was too late I was already grabbing my stuff and getting ready to leave. She stepped in front of me before I reached the stairs she just came up.

"Wait a second give me a chance to explain." She pleaded. I looked at her as she looked to be having some internal battle. "I... I don't know how to put this. I am known for not letting people in. It's just how I am. And yes in my past I have been known to go from girl to girl but I don't do it to be a "player". I'm just waiting to one day find a girl thats different than the rest."

She was pacing the floor now. I'm not even sure if she was aware of my presence anymore she seamed to just be venting to the air.

"You know why I can't settle down? Because every girl wants something from me. Every girl wants to get taken on nice dates so I take them. Every girl wants to be bought fancy jewelry and talk about THEIR feelings and treated like a fucking queen. So I do. But not a single one of them care to even get to know me. They don't care about what I wanna do or what i'm interested in or anything but you know what? They are so quick to throw the L word out like it means something. And that's why I get rid of them so quickly. Because how could they tell me they loved me but not be able to tell me when my birthday was or what my favorite thing to do is or my hopes and dreams. How could you love a stranger."

She looked at me with most vulnerable eyes. I could see her tough exterior slowly taking over again. She had a hard stare now; a look that gave me chills.

"Only one got that far. She tried. But I was immature and I let her go. Who knows where she is now." She looked down to the ground.

I hadn't spoken a word the whole time. What could I say? I could understand how she felt but I didn't even know what I wanted. I don't understand anything going on with myself and my sudden desire for this women. I couldn't promise her that I could give her what the others couldn't. So I asked her.