First off, yes, I know I've been posting a lot today, sorry
Secondly, I really don't want to call this chapter 'Coming out' or 'I'm bi' 'cause I'm not for sure, and that leads me to my 3rd thing.
Thirdly, Hi. Lately, I've been questioning my sexuality. I mean, yes, I've always labelled myself as straight. But I remember once, and I was maybe in, 5th grade or 4th, I got this weird dream, and in this dream, I kissed a girl and stuff. And it was a random girl, like I dunno who it was. Anyway, I thought that it was my mind being weird. Later on in 6th grade, I became much more aware of the LGBTQ+ community. And I completely supported them. And then I shipped my first 2 people, and that ship was Vikklan. Then, towards the end of summer, I had another dream, and this dream was about almost having sex with another random girl, and like I guess you could say it was romantic? I really don't remember the dream other than the, close to sex part. And when I woke up, I was like, what? I mean, I've always had crushes on males and stuff. And then I told myself that maybe I was tricking myself. Maybe I wanted to be apart of this community so much, that I would try and make myself think that I was. I mean, I never really had a crush on a girl, so I thought that I just wanted to be apart of the LGBTQ+ community. Later on, I went to school to welcome the new students and such, and when we were welcoming the new students in my grade, there was this girl with pixie cut hair. And my first reaction was 'She's attractive' but, I mean, you don't have to like girls to find them attractive. My second thought wasn't even a thought. It was butterflies in my stomach. Now, me and this girl never talked, and we still haven't. Heck, I don't even know her name. But everytime I see her, I always get these butterflies and stuff. But then I'm like 'I know NOTHING about this girl, how could I have a crush on her?' I don't even know if I do have a crush on her. And I never really 'fantasized' about us dating and stuff. But she still, for some reason, gives me butterflies. So my first reaction was, wow, am I bi? 'Cause I obviously still like guys and stuff. So I really don't know what else to put. I tried going on websites and tried to figure out if I am actually bi. And I've tried to look in a mirror and say 'I'm bisexual.' but I haven't gotten the guts to. So technically, I haven't even came out to myself yet.
So if you been reading this whole thing, I truly appreciate it. And it legit warms my heart to know that you care enough to read it. And if any of you guys have been through this situation, I would appreciate help, but you don't have to. Or maybe some links covering the subject of, knowing if you're bi, could help too.
Alright, sorry for the boring chapter. I love you all so very much, bye! ^-^
