29. Apples Diamonds and Ink

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JUSTIN POV

I reached over to Maddie's side of the bed and ran my hand over her back. She was turned away from me and herbreathing was such so that I knew she had been sleeping for a couple of hours.

It was cold over here by myself, but I couldn't blame her for being so far away. If I was her, I wouldn't be so buddy-buddy with me right now, either.

I had ruined her Thanksgiving, and I never meant to. I was really trying to be good, but things just didn't turn out too well. The perfect dinner she'd worked so hard for was destroyed.

Thanksgiving was two days ago and even though she said she wasn't mad, I could tell that Maddie wasn't too pleased with me. She wasn't necessarily icy, but there was just a certain tone to her voice that told me I was in big trouble. I was still trying to make up for that horrible night because it was my fault, however directly or indirectly I was involved.

It was all Finn's doing and I really should have been mad at him, but the secret had to come out sooner or later. Might as well be now.

I wasn't apologizing to Keegan. Technically, I guess Keegan did have a right to be mad at me because I had kept something kind of big from him, but what happened before he and Bridget got together was fair game. He was too much of a pussy to make a move, and that wasn't my problem. I seized the opportunity like I always did. I wasn't apologizing for that. He could suck my dick for all I cared because there was no way in hell that I was going to entertain his kindergartenantics. He thought I owed him something. I'd given him an explanation; it was all he was getting from me.

When he started throwing punches, there was no way I was going to back down. No matter how mismatched we were, I wasn't one to give up on a fight.

I didn't even realize I had ruined everything until I was pulled off of Keegan and the evidence of our gladiator-style battle was all over the floor. I acted like such a dick and for the first time in my life, I think I felt remorse or regret or... whatever. I wasn't quite sure what the fuck I was feeling after that since I'd never experienced that particular emotion before.

I should have raced upstairs and begged Maddie's forgiveness, but I couldn't bring myself to do it. I was too much of a pussy to say "I'm sorry" for something that I caused, even though I had said to her before. It made no sense, but my pride was too big for that shit. It was probably why Maddie was being so distant with me.

We would talk and since she was off from school for another couple of days, we had all the time in the world together. But it was tense. I needed to make it up to her and show her that I was sorry, because I really was. I didn't blame her for being that way, though. I blamed Keegan for ruining it all. Currently, we weren't speaking. My older brother was being a douche. If he wanted to act that way, then I was going to treat him that way. End of story.

I continued to rub Maddie's back as she slept, not moving closer until I was certain that she was asleep. Like the creep that I was, I stuck my nose in her hair and smelled the sweet scent of her shampoo.

"I'm sorry," I whispered.

There, that counted.

I scooted closer behind her so that our bodies were flush together and put my arm over her tiny body. That was the only way I could sleep nowadays. Like I had theorized, I was out like a light only five minutes later.

I woke up the next morning with a few thoughts going through my head and a plan of how to get myself back in good graces with Maddie.

Over the duration of the night, she had turned around and was now snuggled under my chin with her head resting on my chest. As I woke up, I noticed that our breathing was identical. It didn't even feel like she was someone separate.

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