The Great Geoffrey and his Tales Of Total AWESOMENESS

Chapter 1: The Couch

In a small town a large department store chain is the bees knees of everyone's shopping destination. Not for Geoffrey however, for him it's not his home, but his prison. "Geoffrey sounds like a bored 40 year old man forced to go with his wife there!" You might say. But he is much more worse then that. He is a squirrel finger puppet. With his shrill high pitched voice he quietly mutters about escaping this death trap.

"Soon, very very sooooooon...." he whispered. Pacing around the everlasting bad coffee tables.

"Wat are you sayin there Geoffrey? Another one of your escape plans?" Said Sir Petershmit the 3rd. Sir Petershmit was unlike other finger puppet dragons, for he was a depressed dragon. It seems to be a well known fact that dragons are jerks, and almost all of them are but this one. Another well known thing is that dragons breath fire right? All but sir Petershmit because instead of fire he breaths self loathing and just over all pity. He's what some refer to in the medical field as a "Debbie Downer". Even though he's a guy. He has green scales but it's not real scales it's just green cloth because remember, he's just a finger puppet. Petershmit also has bad hearing from lack of real ears.

   "I have a plan." He said, "once they close the store we can sneak our way out of this Swedish nightmare." Know keep in mind that he did not think they were friends, just an extra asset and maybe a decoy if one of the assault robots found them trying to escape. Because everyone knows that huge department stores all have them, that's why one changing room is always locked, for the robots obviously.

   To truly understand why they want to escape so badly you need to simply walk into a department store and stay there for exactly 36 hours and 42 minutes. That's the longest someone has stayed in a department store without being corrupted. Those types of stores change a man, they slowly break you then remold you. That's how they get there workers, from poor souls who have spend far to long in a department store. The man I mentioned earlier, he's now the manager of the department store they're trapped at. His last words on his radio he said was, "Its to late for me now, a worker came up to me with an application sheet and now are chanting 'one of us, one of us' to me. They all ready have a vest for me..." then his radio cut out and no one saw him for weeks. The next time he was seen he was helping an old woman buy a couch...