Zootopia - Blurring Lines

Chapter Five - Judy

A/N:

What a month! The story reached two milestones since Chapter 4: a feature on ZootopiaNewsNetwork (thanks Berserker88!), and achieving 50 followers (on FanFiction.net). I really appreciate every view I get, and am immensely gratified that so many of you seem to like reading this story. So, finally, here is Chapter Five.

Enjoy!

HOUR ONE

I slowly pulled away, panting a little as I caught my breath. Nick grinned.

'Are you alright there, Carrots? You're, um, breathing all hard.'

I nodded. 'I'm fine,' then lunged forward and hugged him tightly. 'I love you, Nick. But please, don't bury your past. You need to let go of it.'

He leaned back, looking at me with pain in his eyes. 'Are we really going to talk about this now?' I nodded, putting a paw on his shoulder. 'Fine,' he sighed, resting his muzzle in his paw, 'but I'll keep it short. I had a- a pretty messed up childhood. You already know my ma was a very caring old vixen, but I think...' He took a deep breath, '...I think life got too much for her to handle.'

I looked at him cautiously. I spoke with hesitation. 'Did she... is she...dead?' He shook his head.

'One day when I was eleven, I came home from school and was about to go inside when I heard her voice. She was talking loudly, but it just sounded like she was on the phone. So, I went in, and there she was. Sitting on the floor, talking to herself.' He leaned back against the wall. 'I...I didn't really understand at the time, but she'd finally given in to schizophrenia. Well, she'd always been a bit unstable since Dad left, but she'd managed. And me, well... I just didn't know what to do. She was crying to herself, so I went up to her, and...' He trailed off and wiped his eyes.

'What happened?' I asked.

'She looked at me, but she didn't seem normal. She seemed afraid of me, started screaming at me, telling me to get out... I didn't know what to do, I just... I ran away.'

'That's horrible! What did you do?'

'I met Finnick pretty quick, and he took care of me for a while. Taught me a lot about living on the street, making money, and then... I struck out on my own. Didn't see him for years.'

I was quiet for a few minutes. Me having both of my parents it was, I thought, impossible to even comprehend how Nick felt. 'Did you ever... see her again?' I asked hesitantly.

He shrugged. 'Once, in a care home... but it wasn't her. She didn't recognise me, and... I didn't recognise her. It wasn't just that she spoke differently, but she'd aged decades in a few years. After that, there was really no point. I think she got dementia as well, and she just wasn't... wasn't the same person.' His ears drooped further, and he sniffed a little. 'After that, I just couldn't bear it any more. The only relationships I formed didn't really mean much... well, anything. I thought I couldn't really trust anyone. Until, well... until I met you,' he finished, smiling a little.

I hugged him closer. 'Thank you, Nick. It can't have been easy to talk to me.'

'Au contraire! I actually feel better, getting that off my chest.' He nuzzled the top of my head. 'And besides... what did my favourite fluff-ball tell me to do? Let go of my past?'

'Well, I think you'd be better off...' I said with uncertainty.

'And I think you're worth listening to.'

'What about your mum, though?'

He exhaled slowly. 'I'll... visit her. I know she won't recognise me, but I'll do it. You know, to say... just to say goodbye.'