The Chaotic Interim (boyxboy)

Chapter 25

Carson waited in the main lobby for only about two minutes before he saw Josiah’s black car stop in front of the doors. When he had called his friend to come pick him up, the older boy had said he was already on his way. Carson hadn’t expected him to be that close to the office building already.

The brunet passed through the building’s doors and looked around briefly as he quickly crossed his way over to the car. Carson heard the lock release just before he got his fingers under the handle and pulled. He got the door open and easily slid into the passenger seat.

As the younger boy was putting his seatbelt on, Josiah watched him with a controlled smile on his face. He didn’t want to let his sadness show so easily. “How did it go?”

Carson turned to face his to look at his older friend. The nerves were racing through him. “Uhm, good. I guess.” Josiah started to drive away from the doors so the brunet said, “Can you find a spot to park in for a little while? I wanna...wanna talk to you for a little bit. Before we head home.”

Josiah raised his eyebrows as he stared out of the windshield, but he did as the younger guy asked. The next available parking spot was three rows back, sandwiched between a Suburban and a large pickup truck. He shut the car off and hesitantly looked at Carson. He wasn’t sure what his best friend was going to say, but he knew he had to get his feelings out first.

Talking to his mom made Josiah come to a decision. It was painful, but he knew it was necessary. If he didn’t want to lose Carson completely forever, then he had to just let him go a little bit for now.

Carson’s blood was rushing loudly through his ears, but he made himself say, “I’ve made up my mind.”

Unfortunately, at the same time, Josiah blurted out, “I have to tell you something.”

Both young men were surprised that the other had spoken. They froze and went silent for a couple seconds before they both broke out into some of the most comfortable smiles they had shared in the last few weeks. It almost felt like old times again.

“You go,” Carson said.

Josiah reached a hand up for whatever curls were closest. His smile waned and he said, “Okay, so I know things haven’t been going the way we expected them to the last few months. And even in just the last couple weeks I’ve been a bit pushy.”

The noirette stopped to take a breath, and he was worried he would fail himself and stop talking. Carson watched him with wary eyes. He wasn’t quite sure where Josiah was going with this, but it seemed to be the opposite of what Carson was planning on saying.

Josiah licked his bottom lip very briefly before continuing with, “So I wanna make sure you know I understand why you’ve been ignoring me. I realize it’s wrong and that I’m probably overwhelming you and freaking you out and all of that shit...so, yeah. I guess this is just me saying I’ll back off. And I’m sorry for upsetting you and making you feel guilty or whatever. That’s not what I wanted to do. I just wanted to make you happy.”

Carson’s indigo eyes went wide. Oh yeah. This was definitely not what he was going for with this conversation. He almost felt a little bit frustrated at this point. No, he was feeling incredibly exasperated. For so long it had been Carson pining for Josiah. Then for a while it was Josiah being the one hoping they could be something while the brunet turned him down. And now, after just one afternoon spent apart, things had completely flip-flopped all over again.

But as Carson watched his friend’s face and body language, he saw right through it. Josiah didn’t mean the things he had just said. He had only been saying them because he thought that was what his best friend wanted to hear.