The Alpha's Obsession

11: Regrets

Word Count: 1,469

I couldn't bear to look at him. His deep but soft snores filled the small but immaculate resort room. I didn't regret being with him. He filled some type of void in my heart to a certain extent. But I still wasn't content with myself.

I wasn't sure why however. He was perfect for a girl like me. He could cook, clean, treated me out to dinner and was an excellent lover in bed. The perfect package some might say. But obviously, he wasn't the right package for me.

I tore my eyes from the spot it had been frozen on. They were dry. Free from any type of moisture. I rubbed at them hard to stop the ever so persistent stinging in them. My vision went blurry for a moment before refocusing on the other objects in the room.

His room carried a sort of rich aura to it. The smell of money was everywhere, it irritated my nose and I so longed to escape the putrid smell. I didn't mind it in small doses here and there. But the air in here was suffocating. I felt as if I was choking on money and I hated that feeling.

Looking over at the man that lay beside me, I couldn't help the grimace that materialized on my face. Four lines of red and irritated skin was raised on his back. I know my nails had created them, I just couldn't remember when. When we're together, I never remembered much. Just the before and the aftermath.

The aftermath was always the worse.

His broad back was bathed in the moonlight that streamed through the thin curtains. The slight glow from the moon illuminated the curves and ridges of his fair skinned back, making it seem magical in a way. The way his back rose ever so slightly reminded me that he was indeed alive.

My fingers itched to reach out and touch him but I knew that this man was a representation of sin.

Temptation.

I settled my hands underneath my thighs to keep from reaching out for him. Once trapped in temptation, there was no going back.

Ever.

I shouldn't be here right now. It didn't feel right. Nothing did when I was with him.

Whenever we were together, I felt like I was trying to fit us together even though we didn't fit. We wouldn't ever fit no matter how much pushing and shoving I did. Two puzzle pieces not meant to be together will never fit.

He shifted slightly to his left and I inwardly flinched. Praying that he wouldn't wake from his slumber.

After a few moments of me frozen in place, I released a small sigh that seemed louder in the quiet room.

Swinging my legs over the bed, I make my movements quick and light in order to reduce the sound I was making.

Once my bare feet were placed on the cold hardwood floor, I instantaneously felt better. I felt as if my chest wasn't being constricted by some unknown force.

One step.

Two steps.

My destination was the couch far away from the bed. I couldn't bare to share the same bed with him. It was making me violently ill just thinking about being near him.

Grabbing a spare robe from the closet, I wrapped it around my vulnerable body. The soft fabric of the robe caressed my skin and fit around me snugly.