Chapter XII

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This time, it was almost impossible to ignore the warm feeling growing inside of me. There was something pure and sweet about the way my middle name smoothly poured from his perfect lips, and I couldn't stop thinking about it. My heart ached to hear him say it over and over again. I feel the heat and lunatic smile creep its way onto my face.

Realizing that Mason and Ethan must think I'm insane right now, I swivel my gaze to look at them, mentally slapping myself for my ridiculous thoughts about Josh.

Ethan's the first one to break the awkward tension. "So, you got multiple personalities or are you secretly some stripper named Rose?"

A laugh bubbles up my throat. "It's my middle name, Ethan. A name that nobody calls me, so it's pretty useless." Ethan and Mason nod in understanding, but I could see the hint of jealousy and irritation in Mason's eyes, but I try not to overanalyze it.

My middle name was given to me by my mom's mom at birth, as in my Nana. 'Rose' was my Nana's name, but she passed away when I was seven, and Clarice was ten, and it was as if the name died with her.

Nana was the light of our family, the bright ray of sunshine. She was my best friend, aside from Clarice. It hurt to say her name or talk about her because we were still grieving her loss. My family decided to keep the middle name 'Rose' for Nana's sake because she always wanted to be with us even after she died. I didn't want to say goodbye to her either, so we kept the middle name, but nobody dared to say it aloud. I always thought that my parents and the rest of our family forgot about Nana except Clarice and me. Even then, Clarice didn't call me by my middle name and simply ignored the fact that I even have one.

Before Nana passed away, my family, including my Nana, parents and sister, used to call me 'Emma Rose.' I felt special; Nana thought I was a special child and a fighter. She used to tell me that she saw her childhood in me and thought that I would grow up to become like her. I felt like myself - happy and carefree - when Nana was alive because I was 'Emma Rose' and my Nana's little "Supergirl" as she used to say. My mom's resentment, school bullies or even my judgemental family members never had the power to bring me or my self-esteem down. Why? Because I was Rose, and I had my Nana remind me who I was whenever I was in doubt. I was a fighter; I was strong; I was a badass; I didn't and shouldn't care what people think of me. I was Supergirl.

Ever since we stopped using Nana's name after mine, I lost that part of myself, almost as if it died with the name 'Rose' and my Nana. I forgot about Supergirl.

When Josh called me 'Rose,' I felt the Supergirl in me slowly awaken from her decade-long slumber, and I didn't like the sound of that mainly because I hate him; I'm supposed to hate him. And also because I forgot how to be that girl I once was, and I was afraid of what could happen if I decided to be her - I obviously wouldn't be that girl. I couldn't. I wasn't seven anymore.

I wasn't Rose anymore.

Nana wasn't here to show me who I was. I never had to do anything myself because Nana guided me spiritually and emotionally; I probably never realized that at such a young age, but it was true. I relied on Nana to show me what's right, to guide me to who I was and helped me understand things about myself.

Ethan and Mason didn't have the chance to push me to know more about my middle name because we noticed a breathless Gabby running down the hall and towards us. Once she reaches us, she stops and catches her breath before saying, "Thank god, you guys are still h-here."

"You look scary when you're breathless," Ethan says, and I chuckle."You look like a hungry dog, Gabe. What happened?" Mason asks with amusement. Gabby rolls her eyes and smacks Mason with the back of her hand before whacking Ethan upright on his head.

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