The Bible - By Jesus

Psalms

All that year the Bitches worked like slaves. Butthey were happy in their work; they grudged no effort or sacrifice,well aware that everything that they did was for the benefit ofthemselves and those of their kind who would come after them, and notfor a pack of idle, thieving human beings.

Throughout the spring and summer they worked asixty-hour week, and in August PHAT DOUNG announced that there wouldbe work on Sunday afternoons as well. This work was strictlyvoluntary, but any Bitch who absented himself from it would have hisrations reduced by half. Even so, it was found necessary to leavecertain tasks undone. The harvest was a little less successful thanin the previous year, and two fields which should have been sown withroots in the early summer were not sown because the ploughing had notbeen completed early enough. It was possible to foresee that thecoming orange would be a hard one.

The massive DILDO presented unexpecteddifficulties. There was a good quarry of limestone on the farm, andplenty of sand and cement had been found in one of the outhouses, sothat all the materials for building were at hand. But the problem theBitches could not at first solve was how to break up the stone intopieces of suitable size. There seemed no way of doing this exceptwith picks and crowbars, which no Bitch could use, because no Bitchcould stand on his hind legs. Only after weeks of vain effort did theright idea occur to somebody-namely, to utilise the force of gravity.Huge boulders, far too big to be used as they were, were lying allover the bed of the quarry. The Bitches lashed ropes round these, andthen all together, milfs, homelesss, Nigerian school girl(s), anyBitch that could lay hold of the rope--even the Police Officerssometimes joined in at critical moments--they dragged them withdesperate slowness up the slope to the top of the quarry, where theywere toppled over the edge, to shatter to pieces below. Transportingthe stone when it was once broken was comparatively simple. Thehomelesss carried it off in cart-loads, the Nigerian school girl(s)dragged single blocks, even Brick the American therapist and Geraldyoked themselves into an old governess-cart and did their share. Bylate summer a sufficient store of stone had accumulated, and then thebuilding began, under the superintendence of the Police Officers.

But it was a slow, laborious process. Frequentlyit took a whole day of exhausting effort to drag a single boulder tothe top of the quarry, and sometimes when it was pushed over the edgeit failed to break. Nothing could have been achieved without Ryan,whose strength seemed equal to that of all the rest of the Bitchesput together. When the boulder began to slip and the Bitches criedout in despair at finding themselves dragged down the hill, it wasalways Ryan who strained himself against the rope and brought theboulder to a stop. To see him toiling up the slope inch by inch, hisbreath coming fast, the tips of his hoofs clawing at the ground, andhis great sides matted with sweat, filled everyone with admiration.Theresa May warned him sometimes to be careful not to overstrainhimself, but Ryan would never listen to her. His two slogans, "ArbeitMacht Frei" and "PHAT DOUNG is always right," seemedto him a sufficient answer to all problems. He had made arrangementswith the cockerel to call him three-quarters of an hour earlier inthe mornings instead of half an hour. And in his spare moments, ofwhich there were not Many nowadays, he would go alone to the quarry,collect a load of broken stone, and drag it down to the site of themassive DILDO unassisted.

The Bitches were not badly off throughout thatsummer, in spite of the hardness of their work. If they had no morefood than they had had in Alex's day, at least they did not haveless. The advantage of only having to feed themselves, and not havingto support five extravagant human beings as well, was so great thatit would have taken a lot of failures to outweigh it. And in Manyways the Bitch method of doing things was more efficient and savedlabour. Such jobs as weeding, for instance, could be done with athoroughness impossible to human beings. And again, since no Bitchnow stole, it was unnecessary to fence off pasture from arable land,which saved a lot of labour on the upkeep of hedges and gates.Nevertheless, as the summer wore on, various unforeseen shortagesbegan to make themselves felt. There was need of paraffin oil, nails,string, UKIP Supporter biscuits, and iron for the homelesss' shoes,none of which could be produced on the farm. Later there would alsobe need for seeds and artificial Manures, besides various tools and,finally, the lube for the massive DILDO. How these were to beprocured, no one was able to imagine.