needed me | ᴶᴴˢ × ᴹᵞᴳ

V

It was a cold winter night, however the sky was clear and so the stars and the moon were watching over the whole world. While the moon reflected the light of the sun down to the earth, lighting up the dark night and giving hope to those who thought the night was finally consuming them, the stars sparkled all over the sky, cheering up the minds of those who needed in the most. Together, the moon and the stars built a beautiful harmony, which only could be found during night, a time so many people feared, because they were afraid of the dark. However, darkness cannot exist without light and so where there's darkness, there's also some light left, even if it's just the tiniest bit. One just had to believe, to trust and let oneself be led by the beautiful, clear light that was reflected upon earth by the moon.

Yoongi knew that there would always be some hope left as long as he wouldn't let the darkness consume him completely. He knew he had to be strong, because on day hope might walk back into his life, literally. However, it was so, so hard. It was so hard to keep on believing, to keep on telling his heart that one day the always hungry darkness would go away, would make for some more light again. It was hard, and Yoongi couldn't stop himself from falling backwards into the darkness, which pulled on him with a force that he couldn't get away from. All he could do was staring up at the beautiful lit sky, waiting, hoping for the light to return and to light up his night again. Because, no matter how beautifully bright the moon was, he would never be as bright as the sun. And after all, without the sun the moon wouldn't be able to shine at all.

Some days Yoongi felt like the moon. He was there, illuminating those who let him, however without the sun he couldn't shine as bright. On other days he didn't feel like the moon at all and thought his previous thoughts and feelings were senseless and straight up bullshit, because if he was the night sky, and no matter how hard he tried, he would never be able to light up the night, the darkness at all. Because, his sun, the light he was supposed to reflect was gone and with it all hope. His hope was gone and he was all alone. The saddest part of it was that the sun hadn't come to the conclusion to leaf on her own, no, he had forced the sun to leave. He had forced the sun to make for the always consuming darkness. He was the one who banned the light from his life and let the darkness take over. It was his own fault.

Some people told him that one would always get a second chance. Well, he wished for nothing more than a second chance. A chance to apologize, a chance to change himself and to make sure that what he had done would never happen again. A chance to hunt down the darkness and to replace it with the brightest of all light sources. Hope.

Yoongi was staring up at the sky, watching the stars sparkle above him, wondering if the person he loved the most and that he hurt so badly, was watching the sky too. A tiny smile creeped upon his face, causing the muscles of his cheeks to ache a little. He hadn't been smiling in a while now, at least not genuinely. The cold air was clearing his clouded mind, occupied by thoughts of 'what if..'. He took a deep breathe in, feeling the way the cool air flooded his lunges. He like it. He closed his eyes for a while before he opened them again, continuing to watch the stars sparkle and the moon lighting up those parts of the earth which were currently shrouded of the sun's warmth. For a moment Yoongi allowed himself to forget about everything, about all his worries, about all his memories and everything he had done wrong. Just during that short while he let his body be flooded by the hope radiating off of the moon, breathing it in and flooding his whole body. For the shortest of time he allowed himself to feel happy.

However, the moment was just gone as fast as it had come and Yoongi felt reality crushing back down at him once again. He felt the way regret was taking over his body again, destroying everything that was left of the hope inside him. He sighed deeply as the aching in his heart returned and he wanted, no, needed nothing more than the warm embrace of a certain human being that was somewhere in the same city as he was, yet so far away and unreachable. He missed him with every fiber of his body, with every part of his mind, with everything that made him a human being.