Perfect Christmas [2016 Edition]

8. Jax

J A X

Afterwards, we make our way back to the living room, both Blaire's and my hands clasped together. She seems nervous, now having to face the huge group of people that will now be bombarding her with questions regarding the pregnancy. I give her hand a tight squeeze for reassurance, and from the corner of my eye, her lips twitch into a smile.

"Hey," Cara says, rising from the couch. Sienna and Alex get up as well, their faces apologetic. Cara appears to look the most guilty. She heads over to Blaire, worry lines masking her forehead. "I'm terribly sorry about the whole thing—I know you're probably mad at me about it. I shouldn't have been a nosy bitch and looked through the trashcan anyway. I understand if you hate me—"

"Cara, of course I don't hate you." Blaire shakes her head, laying a hand on Cara's shoulder. "It's fine. I'm not mad." She looks at both Alex and Cara, and smiles reassuringly at the both of them too. "I'm not mad at any of you guys, I promise. So don't worry about it."

"Thank god," Cara breathes, her shoulders rolling back, the tenseness disappearing. "I was so scared—"

"It's alright. It was bound to come out anyway," Blaire shrugs.

"I think I need to hug you," Alex says, her arms already opening. Blaire laughs and embraces her tightly. Soon enough, the rest of the girls join in.

I roll my eyes.

Girls. And their need for affection.

"Thanks guys," Blaire says, patting all of them on the shoulders.

"So, are we going to talk about your baby?" Sienna says, placing her hands on her hips. "Because damn, I finally have someone to share all these things with—"

Blaire cuts a glance at me. I send one back. Do you want me to tell her? I ask silently.

My girlfriend shakes her head. I'll do it. Then, a jerk of a chin. You can go first.

I nod back. I'd reckon after Blaire spills everything to them, they're gonna wanna talk it through. I let them have their time. I glance around the room and spot Simon teaching Eden how to play the new Nintendo that I've gotten for him as a Christmas gift. Evans seem to be staring at his phone, as if he's expecting a call from someone, and Brent appears to be saying something really important to him—maybe consoling him for the call he never received. I won't want to get in between of that.

Meanwhile, Daniel's having a staring contest with our new pet cat, apparently—a contest that he seems to be losing. I let him have his fun with the feline.

Sliding through the doors, a cool wisp of air whips past me as I step onto the patio. I don't bother locking the doors behind me. Pushing myself onto the ledge, I let my legs dangle as I stare into the night sky, the full moon casting a warm glow over the rooftops of houses in front of me. It's a chilly night, and if I were the old me, I'd totally kill for a cigarette right now, but I've quit for Blaire and she'll have my balls if I'm seen smoking again.

Plus, I have to set a good example for Eden. He already sees me as a troublemaker, which is true. To a certain extent.

Damn, I wonder if my kid will see me that way. I don't want him to. I'll have to be on my best behavior for the rest of his life—no more crude jokes, no more swear words. And none for Blaire either. God, it's going to be hard as fuck for the both of us. Ah shit, let's face it: we'll probably let some words slip. His first word is probably going to be like 'fuck' or something.

I laugh to myself quietly.

Fuuuuck, we're going to be horrible parents.

I rest my arms on my thighs, my head bobbing slightly. I guess we won't be the most perfect parents, but I do know that we're going to try our damnest to be the best we can. Besides, how bad can it be? Eden's doing great under our weekend parental care. And he's like the best kid in the world.