Mackenzie(ON HOLD)

Chapter 6

Gillian,

I have granted ye your divorce. Enclosed are the papers that ye need only sign and it will be done. I have acquired a bride and will wed her before the month's end... I pray to God that you've changed your mind and if so, come home.

Come home.

You are the only one.

Lachlan

I stare at the words, silently. I had expected to read the letter, unable to handle it's contents. Unable to handle hearing from him. Yet, the longer I stare the words, the more I realize that his words are meaningless.

Home? Come home... Was that place ever a home? Or did I trick myself to believe it because I had to, to remain sane?

I've felt what can amount to love for Lachlan but only because apart of me pushed back the bad. Pushed back the rage of being cheated on or- feeling the hard ridges of his knuckles, even if it was once.

He tricked me into loving him, all while keeping me under a tight leash- a tight, invisible leash. I was oblivious to his power, to his schemes.

Lachlan may want me, he may even love me, but it's suddenly clear, crystal clear that there was never a competition. I felt the loss of a life I'd grown to know, a man I'd grown to care for.

But, I begin to remember now. I remember that there wasn't a day, even on my best ones, where MacCallan's face, or his voice, didn't enter my mind- my soul. He was always there, in that castle, in that village, under that tree... even inside our bedroom.

Lachlan did something I thought to be impossible. In a work of genius, he diminished my ideals for love. He diminished what I believed I deserved. He may have tried to the best of his ability but he never truly made me a priority.

He was always on trips. He was always locked in his study with William. The only time I truly became everything for him was when I was leaving. Even when Josephine died, he left on a trip, his duties to the clan more important.

I stand up and grab a pen off the desk. I scribble over the crossed line, sealing the divorce with my name and head for the door. I've not seen this clearly since that night in the woods with MacCallan. I find Kellan in the entrance way, carrying logs.

I don't stop speaking until he's carrying the letter back out the door, headed to find a messenger.

Picking up my skirts, I hurry towards the dining room, stopping outside when I hear the lood booming voice of Ennis.

"How could ye do this, MacCallan?! Lachlan Macintosh, chief of Clan Chattan! Do ye understand how many enemies ye just made? How much ye look like a fool?"

"All for a outsider too!" Macadie exclaims, loudly. "I understand why ye felt compleled to have her. She is a pretty thing but-"

"If ye dinnae shut your mouth about her, I will do it for ye... I told ye the truth! I told you why this had to happen!"

"She cannae produce ye an heir, MacCallan! You are the oldest one of us! You're telling us that you willnae produce a child to extend your legacy?"

"My legacy? Do ye even hear yourself?!"

"Aye, your legacy! No one in this family pretends that you're anything less than what you are! You're a healer!" Ennis says, loudly. "Ye perform miracles and you're known for it... but sillying yourself to this extent... do you honestly think no one will find out? Ye didnae go for a mindless kitchen maid... ye went for nobleness! Ye went against a man that has connections all over Scotland!"