Second Time's The Charm

Chapter 27

As a shinobi, you reach a certain age where everything just starts to blend together. Especially in a place where humans can call up the elemental natures, teleport, and bring back the dead. Nothing surprises you anymore and you fear very little because you can only crap your pants so many time before you just don't care anymore.

And honestly, living to 40 years of age is a celebration in itself – one that Shikaku was damn proud of.

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It was just too bad his daughter would not be able to celebrate the same feat as well.

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Because when he finds her...

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*CRASH*

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If he survives...

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"GET BACK HERE YOU SPINELESS DEER!"

Shikaku turned the corner just in time to avoid a metal filing cabinet flying through the air. Papers littered the air as they poured out the metal drawers. Shikaku paused to blankly stare at the damage the file cabinet made on its way out of the building.

Two holes...

There was a hole in the wall going into an office and a hole not far after that one, exiting the office – the filing cabinet falling to its death outside. Frozen stiff inside the office was Inoichi, sitting at his desk with his mouth wide open – the hole the file cabinet went out an inch to his left.

"I so badly want to stand here and laugh at Inoichi, but..." Shikaku thought, hearing the sound of loud footsteps of his Hokage racing towards him. Without another thought, Shikaku proceeded to... Well anywhere not here...

"YOU CAN'T RUN FROM ME NARA! BY ORDER OF THE HOKAGE YOUR PROCREATING ABILITIES ARE HEREBY REVOKED!"

Shikaku turned another corner before plowing through the doors to the jounin break room. Inside he found several battle-scarred warriors hiding behind chairs and tables – kicking each other out of their hiding places to offer up as some sort of sacrifice.

Shikaku gave them a dull look before rubbing his forehead, "Oh previous Hokages... I can only hope that you are looking over the village and protecting us from danger. Because its current protection is a bunch of adolescent morons..."

"Damnit Raido... STOP KICKING ME OUT!" Aoba shouted, getting into a slapping match with his fellow jounin behind the couch.

*BAM*

Shikaku's head snapped behind him at the sound of the doors slamming open again. He went pale as a dark aura spilled into the room – a woman crackling in wicked laughter slowing walking into the room.

"...Found you..."

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"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!" Screamed the room, full of shinobi.

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Looking back at the events to follow, many would claim the lack of capable ninja to defend the Leaf during a possible evasion, and other terrible events, was due to accepting of too many missions at once.

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However...

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The victims of that night – all the ninja in the jounin break room (and a few other shinobi in the wrong place at the right time) as well as the hospital staff knew better...