Ace Of Spades (Complete Raw First Draft, Unedited)

Fourty- Two: Blame

Clyde opened the door when I knocked on it, a scowl plastered over his face, but he hesitated when he recognised me.

Bonnie was staring wide eyed from the bed behind Clyde, looking just as rigid as him. He relaxed slightly, but she didn't.

"It's only Ace, sweetheart," he called to her over his shoulder and she nodded, wiping at her eyes. "I'll just be out here, okay?"

"How is she?" I asked as he stepped outside, closing the door behind him.

He was biting his lip the way he always did when he was stressing over something, rubbing at one arm with his hand, glancing away to the side.

"She's fucked up, man," he responded, his voice hitching in his throat. "She's paranoid as hell, I don't know if it's the shit they injected her with, or if she's traumatized..."

He broke of, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands.

"Maybe Debbie can help," I suggested, but he shook his head.

"She doesn't want to see anyone," he told me. "And I'm not going to force her and upset her even more. I don't know what to do."

He twined his fingers together behind his head, staring up at the roof.

"I let this fucking happen to her, man."

"You didn't let shit happen to her," I insisted. "She knows that you did everything you could. You can't blame yourself for this."

He drew in a shaking breath and shook his head, looking crestfallen and broken. I hated seeing him like this. He was the happiest guy I knew, and I couldn't stand the haunted look in his eye. I pulled him into a tight hug, thumping his back reassuringly.

Things had looked bad, a few hours ago, but we'd won, he needed to understand that. Everything that happened now was going to be okay. Bonnie was in bad shape, sure, but we had her, and we could help her, now that she was safe, again.

"Fuck, we're gay," he muttered as he pulled away after a moment, trying to smile, but it came out all wrong.

"Clyde?" Bonnie called from the other side of the door, and Clyde quickly looked in around the corner.

"I'm just here, sweetheart," he assured her.

I turned when I heard footsteps approaching, about to send whoever it was away from Bonnie, but it was only Jenna, moving painfully.

"How is she?" She wondered, stopping short about three feet away, keeping her distance from me.

"Not so good," I told her truthfully.

"Will she let me talk to her?" She wondered, but I shrugged, shaking my head.

"She really won't see anyone."

Jenna nodded understandingly

"I just want to know that she's okay," she told me, tears springing to her eyes.

She angrily wiped them away and I tentatively moved toward her, placing my hand on her waist when she didn't back away. I felt her tense up, though, just like she used to.

"Bonnie is fine," I assured her, as she stared at the space between us. "She has Clyde to take care of her. I want to know that you're going to be alright."

Jenna bit her lip, saying nothing. I swallowed hard, tilting her chin up so I could study her face, but she pulled away.

"I'm fine," she promised, looking away once more.

Clyde came back out a second later, glancing at me, then at Jenna.

"Hey, Jenna," he said, and she smiled tightly at him.