Phil
I can't stop staring at my barren hand. I rub the ring finger of my left hand over and over until I almost see the faint indentation from a wedding band. I'm not quite sure why it hurts so much when Dan tells me he's married. Of course he is, why wouldn't he be? He's handsome and clearly talented. I almost want to ask him if the photographs are for sale, but I just can't seem to do so.
He stares at me with pain in his eyes as I fidget with my hand, so I drop them, not wanting to cause him anymore sadness. I don't want his pity. We stand there, silence filling everything, until I feel as though I'm drowning in it. I search my brain for some excuse to leave, but something is keeping me frozen to this spot.
"Dan!" calls a voice, and I glance behind me to see a girl with blonde waves tossed up in a messy ponytail.
"I'm so sorry to do this to you right now, but we're backed up and Chris isn't here yet and I'm completely tied up in the kitchen, and.."
"Bryony," inturrupts Dan sadly, "It's fine, I'll be over in a second."
My heart drops suddenly when I realize that our time together is over. I try and feel an ounce of guilt, knowing that this man is already taken, yet I can't.
"Phil, I..." Dan starts, and I can already hear the list of feeble excuses that threaten to escape his lips. So, he surprises me when he continues speaking
"...I need to go. But, I'll see you later, maybe?"
It's a question, and I have absolutely no idea what to say. Every ounce of my being is dying to day yes. I want to talk to him again, to get to know him and.... Well I shouldn't indulge myself on impossible fantasies. I let out a small sigh, my shoulders slumping a little under the weight of my decision.
"Maybe." I offer Dan in response, followed by a half smile. That seems to please him, and I feel his hand gently squeeze my shoulder as he walks swiftly past.
I stare at him as he disappears into the crowd of people up by the register. I linger and watch until I can no long make out his messy brown hair amongst the rest. I turn back around, hoping to at least get another glimpse of the photographs again, only to see that a young couple is standing in front of them. The man with his arms wrapped around her, as she leans into him, resting her head on his shoulder. They look so happy and carefree.
I envy them.
oOo
"Mr. Lester." a man greets me when I return back to the building, and I incline my head in his general direction as a response.
I trudge back through the halls, the dull gray walls are almost painful in comparision to the warmth of Dan's cafe. Even though I had a scone not too long ago, my stomach rumbles, feeling hollow and empty.
I guess I should eat something.
The smell of cooked food grabs my attention and I wander the halls looking for the source. I stop when I see an open door with a buffet of food spread out on a long table. I shuffle over and glance at what was being offered. Nothing looks too appealing, but it looks edible, so I take a plate from a smiling person and pile some on.
Turning around, I see flimsy tables set up all around the room, with a plastic daisy suspended in a vase on the center. I sit down at a vacant table and take a few careful bites of food. It's bland and barely edible. So much for my previous thought. My taste buds crave Dan's scone, bursting with spices. After realizing that I won't get anything like that here, I sigh and scoop up another forkful of what I believe to be chicken into my mouth.. Or maybe it's pork. Resigned I chew,swallow and repeat the process continously until I empty the plate and fill my stomach.
My gaze remains on my food for most of the time, but once I finish, I look up and take in the surroundings. Only a few other tables are occupied, most are couples, others with just one person. Nobody catches my eye, so I push back my chair, ready to return to my drab apartment and enjoy the solitude for awhile.
As I start to stand up, my eye catches the plastic daisy on my table and a memory suddenly resurfaces. A hazy image of a couple racing through a field, laughing. The brown-haired boy runs behind a large tree as if to hide, but the black-haired one find hims immediately and they fall back on the grass, dotted with daisies. I strain see through the fog and see their faces clearly, but the memory fades away much like the last one. When the sound of a nearby chair screeching across the yellow linoleum pulls me out of my head, I notice my hands are shaking and my pulse is beating in my ears.
I try to catch my breath and use my napkin to wipe away the wetness that has spilled from my eyes.
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I sort of wrote like 24 pages of new content for this fic so I'm just going to upload it all at once ^.^
CITEȘTI
Forget Me Not - A Phanfiction
Fanfiction*contains brief mentions of self-harm* They say that love has no boundaries but what if one of them can't remember who they love? Phil suffers from memory loss in which he can't remember the previous day or his relationship with the love of his life...
