No Turning Back

The Wonderful Mr. Delgado

"What are you over there smiling about," I heard Melanie say. We were in my room lounging around since we had just gotten off of school for Thanksgiving break. Honestly, I barely even heard her. I was too busy laughing at Jayden who I was texting. He was yelling at me because I'd taken the sweet liberty in insulting his favorite MMA fighter and then told him that the fighter who he absolutely hated was better. I was expecting him to get pissed off at me but he was more than just pissed off. That boy takes his MMA stuff very seriously – more seriously than I thought he did. The second he read my first message, I think bells went off in his head since he just started cursing me out in Spanish over texts. I mean, he did know I was only playing around but he probably just decided that it would be fun to yell at me for it. Or maybe he was serious. I wasn't quite sure. All I knew was that I was going to get pummeled into the ground the next time he saw me. But, then again, my joke did lighten the atmosphere between us.

Ever since altercation with his stepfather a couple weeks ago, Jayden has been acting a bit like how he used to. He didn't really like talking much, his ice wall had risen and he began to distance himself from me. A part of me figured that Jayden probably thought that I was going to break up with him or something because of what I saw. While I didn't see much, it must have been enough in Jayden's eyes. Plus, his whole little speech about death at the park didn't really help anything. I think that was the most he'd talked since. Other than that, he let me do all the talking. It was hard though. I didn't want to go on acting as if there wasn't something bothering him when I knew clearly that there was. So, I tried constantly to get him in a brighter mood but none of my charades really worked. I could see that the altercation had bothered him more than he wanted to let on.

"Huh," I asked Melanie, looking up at her with a dumbfounded face. My best friend was staring at me with a raised eyebrow, her mouth pursed in suspicion. She tilted her head at me as she spoke next.

"You've been unnaturally happy lately, you know. That's kind of confusing since you just broke up with Mia. Shouldn't you be going through post-break-up depression or something?" She paused for a second before continuing. "Why did you break up with her anyway? You never told me."

"Oh...it just didn't work out," I said with a soft shrug. "And I'm just happy because life has been good lately. Is it a crime for a guy to smile?"

"No but you have those unnaturally happy, blissful smiles going on." My phone buzzed again causing Melanie's eyes to drop down towards it. "Do you have a secret lover that you're not telling me about," she asked. My stomach clenched slightly at the sound of her question. I felt a bit of guilt roll over me. I wished that I could tell her about my budding relationship with Jayden – she probably wouldn't care that I was gay. But then again, I wasn't afraid of what she was going to think about my sexual orientation. I had faith that she would love me anyway. I was just being insecure about our relationship, that's all. I mean, it was just still so new and fragile. I didn't want anyone to mess that up – not that Melanie would mess it up but just the simple thought scared me. Jayden and I had grown so close in such a short period of time yet I couldn't bear the thought of losing him. I liked having him all to myself. I liked the way our relationship was developing in the sense that we could be ourselves without any judgment. I liked the way he held me, the way he kissed me. I didn't want any of that to change. So, that meant that I was just better off keeping our relationship on the low level that it's been on.

"No," I said evenly. "So, how are you and Damien? Are you guys officially a thing yet or do I need to confront him to give him a little inspiration?" Melanie blushed deeply, looking down so that some of her honey brown hair covered her face.

"We are officially a couple actually," she said bashfully. I smiled at her. "It's a funny story actually. He took me to dinner a week or two ago but it's not like your average date night dinner. I'm talking this really expensive, fancy restaurant. Anyway, we had a great dinner and we danced a little bit and stuff. Then at the end of the night, I lie to you not, Damien got down on one knee and proposed a relationship with a cute promise ring and everything." She held her hand out to show me the silver ring that had a small heart shaped diamond on it. "It was the absolute cutest thing ever! The whole restaurant clapped for us and it was just so perfect!" My smile widened as I watched her gush on about her new beau. Seeing her wide smile and the sparkle in her eyes made me happy. I could tell this guy was proving himself to her in the best ways possible and I respected him for that. Melanie deserved someone who would treat her like the princess she is – even over little stuff like making a relationship official. I just hoped that this guy wouldn't break her heart. If he did then I would have to borrow some of those big guns that Jayden owned.