*sitting in the living room with my father while he lectures me about who i'm going to marry*
dad- he's gotta be christian, able to support a family, and know his stuff about money
me- *nods, not very interested in the conversation*
dad- and if i see you bring a guy in our house that looks like the lead singer of green day, i will kick his ass out before he even has the chance to say hello.
me- *snickers loudly because that's totally gonna happen one day*
dad- i'll tell him, if he has earrings i'll sew his ears back up. if he paints his nails i will physically break them off.
me- *thinks of frank iero* *bursts into laughter*
dad- you can leave now.
me- *waltzes out casually while muttering, 'lol you don't know what's coming for you, dickhole.'*
this actually happened i'm not even kidding. i wanted to share.
