The Art of Losing Yourself

Chapter Eight

Raven's P.O.V

Oh joy the arcade, why am I surprised. BeastBoy practically lives here. He dragged me all around the arcade for hours. We earned tickets and he got me a teddy bear.

By the time we left the arcade we were both laughing but we stopped when he held my hand. I felt my cheeks turn red and I knew he was blushing too. Everything felt different when I was with him. That maybe I wasn't alone and everything would be okay.

But I didn't know if everything would be okay, the world still feels like it's falling apart. When we got back and said goodnight I couldn't help but cry my eyes out. I put fresh cuts on my wrist and just cried. I hated myself because I knew if anything happened between us, I would ruin him.

I didn't want him to worry, or watch over me. I had to take care of this myself. And if that meant ending my life, then so be it.

I went up to the roof of the tower and looked over Jump City. Why can't I just be happy? Why does everything have to end up like shit?

"Hey Raven, what are you doing on the roof?" I felt my body freeze. "Uh nothing BeastBoy I was just admiring the view." "Oh okay, mind if I join you?" All I did was nod.

We stood in silence, enjoying the view from the tower when he broke the silence. "Look Raven, I had fun today and I was wondering.." "Don't." I said sternly.

"But why not? What's wrong I thought there was something between us?" "No there's nothing, there can be no us." "And why not?" He asked turning towards me but I didn't want to look at him. "I can't explain."

"Bull Raven, you can explain you just don't want to tell me your secrets. Why won't you let me in, I can help you..." "I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP, I JUST WANT YOU TO LEAVE ME ALONE!" I yelled pulling away from him.

I kept my back turned but I could feel hurt radiating from his body. But it quickly turned to anger. "Fine." And with that he turned away, leaving me alone with my dangerous thoughts.

A Month Later

Surprise surprise, everything somehow got worse in a month. For some reason Terra came crawling back to the team and fake apologized to me. Now she has BeastBoy again, who is only dating her to spite me.

I sat in my room, all alone again. The threats from Slade had slowly gone down, I think he's tired of playing my game. I don't want to even bother with fighting anymore.

I haven't left my room at all. I just sit, read, and stare at my walls. There's no point into my existence anymore anyway. No one bothers to check on me, mostly because I convinced them that everything is fine. When nothing really is.

I just needed to escape and I already had the perfect plan, I would do it tonight. I would finally end my life once and for all.

BeastBoy's P.O.V
I haven't talked to Raven for a whole month, she said to leave her alone and honestly she broke my heart. But getting back together with Terra was a really bad idea.

I somewhat liked her but I didn't appreciate how clingy she was and how she always flirted with other guys behind my back. I needed a break from her and ran down the hallway. I ran out of breath right in front of Raven's door.

I sighed and mentally prepared myself to knock on her door. When I finally did however, there was no answer. I turned into a bug and crawled under the door.

I turned back and got a strong whiff of blood. I felt my heart rate pick up. I noticed the door to Raven's bathroom was closed and the light was on. I slowly opened the door and freaked out when I saw Raven bleeding in the bathtub.

Her eyes were glazed over but I felt a small pulse. I began panicking and quickly turned on my communicator. "Guys I need help now, Raven's bleeding badly in her room. I think she tried to kill her self. Hurry I don't know how long she can make it!!" I tried to stop the bleeding a bit until they got here.

The other Titans ran into the room and Starfire screamed. Cyborg picked her up and ran her down to the infirmary.

All I remember that day was sitting outside waiting, and hoping Raven would be okay. Her blood was all over my hands and my uniform but I didn't care. We waited for hours until Cyborg told us she was alive.

The next morning we all made the decision to put her into the hospital and the rest of the story is already told.
Now we are up to date.

At The Hospital

"And that's the story, that's what happened to me." Raven sighed and curled up into a ball.

BeastBoy walked over to her and put an arm around her shoulders. "Don't worry Rae, well get through this together." Raven managed a small smile and put her head on his shoulder.
"Yeah, I guess we will."

The End.