Spark of Paracausality: A new spark

Chapter 33: The Nightfall Before

All of us returned to the Tower later that night. Some of us went to sleep, as for the others stood awake. I stared at the Traveler and the City, leaning on the railing. I stare with a straight face, with my eyes half narrowed. I could only think of one thing; I can't fail. the Vanguards, the Speaker, the City is relying on me to do this, even if they don't know it. Ikora believes that I'm smart enough to get through and destroy the heart. Zavala believes that I'm strong enough to hold myself in the darkest of the Darkness. And Cayde... he believes that I probably won't die. So really no pressure? There's a lot of it.

My heart beat is faster than normal because I keep thinking about it. I'm scared, I really am. I look around and see the Plaza pretty much closed up shop. Tess's store is closed, Cryptarch isn't there, vendor lights are off, and the interior Tower lights are off while the edges of the Tower lights are still on. The light shines my face a little, as the mild wind blows, letting my hair flow with it. As it flows, I realize that my hair has grown longer. Maybe like half of a foot. It was at shoulder length, now it's at back length. The front goes down to my collarbone.

All I hear is just the wind, the faint sounds of the City, and the carrier ships that occasionally fly by. I'm the only one at the Plaza, it's so empty, and quiet. I close my eyes. I relax myself and let my thoughts go. Just for a minute. Think about nothing, or no one at all, just experience what I'm feeling. I hold in my hands my helmet. Celestial Nighthawk. I'll always remember the feeling of this helmet. This helmet, it has so much Light. Why is it so special? I can feel it's containment. There's so much Light, ready to be released. I want to unlock its exotic power. I want to know what it does.

"Hey," a voice a said.

I open my eyes and turn around to see Felix.
I say hi back. He leans against the railing next to me. We stare at the City, having nothing to really say to each other.

"So uh, I just wanted to say that... I'm proud of how much you've grown," he says, rubbing his neck.

I smirk. "Thanks dad."

"You know what I mean," he chuckles. "I also wanted to say that I'm sorry. For having mixed feelings."

I look a bit to the left, away from him. "Don't be sorry. I understand who you feel for. Besides, I hate it when people apologize to me again and again," I said. "Just be with who you like. Be inclined to whom you trust. We'll see in the end who will be your closest. Don't sorrow for past. Rather, savor for the present and future. If you do so, you'll never find a negative in your life."

It was silent. I said my piece.

"I've been doing that since I was resurrected. I've been alone, starving, dying, lost. The only thing I had was my Ghost, and my knife. I've been in torture during those times," Felix muttered, but just loud enough to hear.

I turn to him. "You have to bring that up, it wasn't your fault."

"But it was!" He raises his voice. "I couldn't lift it up! I could've saved her..."

"You can't blame yourself, the Fallen would've killed you, for good," I said, staring at him.

"But that doesn't give an excuse for their deaths," he said, staring at me back.

"Felix, listen. Letting go means to come to the realization that some people are a part of your history, but not a part of your Destiny. When you least expect it, life sets us a challenge to test our courage and willingness to change; at such a moment, there is no point in pretending that nothing has happened or saying that we are not ready. The challenge will not wait. Life does not look back. A week is more than enough time for us to decide whether or not to accept our Destiny."