Collision

Chapter 10

Connar

I fucked up bad.

She hates me. I broke the one thing I had left in the world. I hurt the only person that cared about me.

And now she's gone.

I chased everyone away, Alex, Amelia.

I'm also the reason Amelia has almost died several times in the last four years. If I would've stopped drinking for one damn minute and looked at my sister, she might still be here.

She would not be off with some guy. She would be right down the hall in her room I would've just stopped. I'm surprised, honestly, that she hasn't told anyone but the boy.

I wish she would, though. I deserve to rot in jail. My drunk ass should be arrested.

I would do anything to have another chance to make things right with my sister.

I thought back to all the times I had hit her, threatened her, and nearly killed her. I was a monster.

I sat in the middle of my living room floor, in my empty apartment. After Amelia left, I had everything removed. I sold it, or threw it out. I no longer had a couch, chair, TV, bed, or dresser. Everything except the buildings accessories were left.

The hardwood was cool beneath me, begging me to fall over dead. And I thought I just might, all it would take was a few pills.

I fell on my back, taking in deep breaths. Memories from long ago running through my mind.

Flashback

I watched as tiny Amelia circled around my mom and dad. Her childish laughter echoing softly throughout the homemade play ground.

I was eighteen at the time, just about to start college. Alex was meeting us for a picnic at noon.

I watched as my mom scooped Amelia in her arms, swinging her around like she was weightless. She practically was.

She screamed, laughter following soon after. My dad took Amelia from my mom when she got tired.

"Sweetie, it's time to settle down. Look at your shoes, you got them so dirty! Alex won't like that, let's change them." He said, pulling her to his chest.

We still had an hour till the picnic, and Amelia had gotten dirt all over her shoes, which my father took her to change. He carried her inside like a baby. My mom looked at me sadly, like it was the last time she'd see me.

"My baby's all grown up." My mom cried.

I knew what she meant, she was upset about me leaving for college.

"Mom, it's college. I'll be a phone call away, and I'll visit as much as possible." I reassure.

"B-but what about Amelia, Connar? She needs her brother." She cries.

"Mom, I'll call her every day, as soon as you get her a phone. Until she does, though, I'll call you and talk to her everyday. It'll work out, mom." I tried harder to get her to stop crying.

Little did I know, my mom wouldn't be around forever.

Present