in which a broken-hearted boy describes the after effect of losing love and friendship.
meet grayson, a boy whose mind works as fast as his heart beats, and loves as much as he can. this is the life of a boy who lost everything.
**completed**
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it was 2 pm, and today was the day i was going to meet everyone at the coffee shop. sandy was perched on my bed, swinging her feet around in the air as i nervously paced back and forth around her. i kept tugging at my hair every now and again, mumbling things under my breath about what could go wrong.
"okay, grays, seriously stop. you're freaking me out with all of that pacing. it's going to be fine! we already talked about this. you have two more hours until you meet them there. calm down. please! before i go crazy!" she laughed, patting the bed next to her, signaling for me to sit.
i sat next to her, taking a few deep breaths. "sandy, so many things could go horribly wrong. maybe this was a bad idea."
"no, grayson. so many things could go wrong, you're right, but so many things could go right! you'll never know if you don't show up," she said, her tone quiet and sincere. she began running her hands through my hair for me, trying to stop me from pulling at it anymore.
"i know, but what if-"
"stop, grayson. you're going to drive yourself crazy," she cut me off.
she was right. if i kept worrying about the what-ifs, i would drive myself crazy. i needed to focus on what i would say to them, and how i would react. i needed to stop focusing on what they would say and how they would react because i will never know. i'll never know what goes through their heads unless they tell me. it wasn't for me to worry about because all i knew was what i would do and say. and that was all that mattered to me.
"okay," i said to her, laying down on my back.
"alright," she responded, laying beside me. i stared at my ceiling, wondering what the others could possibly be doing and thinking about, even if it wasn't my concern at all. courtney was probably on the way here, or getting ready to be. i know she's nervous. samson is probably discussing the matter with his mom, and nichole is probably trying to muster together some kind of courage to come. darryn was probably not at all concerned about this event because he never worried about anyone or anything but himself, and alex was probably more of a nervous wreck than i am.
i hated how well i knew them because they probably never knew me that well. maybe they did at some point, but now, it didn't matter to them. none of this mattered to them.
after an hour and a half of staring at my ceiling and talking nonsense with sandy, i decided to get ready to leave. i sighed nervously, slipping on a pair of shoes. sandy slid her sandals onto her polished feet, and patted my back as we walked to her car. she insisted on coming with for support. i told her that wouldn't be such a good idea, so we agreed that she would wait in the car for good measures. sandy always knew what was the right thing to do.
