disregard // paul lahote

07

When Marley was ten, she had begged her mom for months to sign her up for ballet lessons. Her mom's only response was that they couldn't afford them.

Marley's mom was overwhelmed with guilt as she watched her young daughter sniff back crocodile tears when she broke the news, and decided she would work extra shifts to save up for ballet lessons at a local dance studio.

Marley spent every Saturday morning for ten weeks attending ballet lessons, each night she would practice for her up-coming recital.

Her mom had invited all of Marley's extended family to attend the recital, and watch as Marley showed off her newly learned dance skills- but the night of the recital, Marley decided she didn't want to perform.

She had spent all morning sitting at the kitchen table as her mom pulled and pinned her hair back into a slick bun, gelling down each of her curly baby hairs as she jittered with excitement. But when Marley found herself standing backstage in her tutu, she was overwhelmed with nausea from how nervous she suddenly felt.

She peered past the thick velvet curtain to see a crowd of family members awaiting the next performance, and Marley spotted her mom holding a video camera in her hand as she chatted to her aunt.

She closed her eyes and took a few deep breaths, giving herself the best pep talk she could manage.

Eight years later, Marley found herself in the same position. She was sat in her car, parked outside of Emily and Sam's house- trying to convince herself to turn the engine off and step outside.

She came to the conclusion that she regretted her decision to drive up to La Push, and reached for the gear shift when she made eye contact with a bare chested Jacob Black who was patrolling the property.

Marley groaned as she forced herself to reach for the door handle and step onto the damp grass, taking deep breaths as Jacob jogged in her direction.

"Marley, hey." He greeted- the confusion in his voice evident.

She cleared her throat as she tried to rid her mind of the memory of him forming into a large wolf.

"I'm looking for Paul," She stated. "Is he around?"

Jacob's eyebrows lifted in shock before he peered behind him, gesturing to Emily's house. "He's inside," He answered.

"Thanks," She brushed past him and headed towards the wooden porch.

Jacob shook off the confusion and quickly caught up with Marley, tucking his hands in his pockets.

"Are you okay? I mean- I just never expected to see you around here after what happened." Jacob hinted, watching as Marley winced at the mention of the bonfire.

"I'm," She paused to think of a response. "It's just a huge shock. I tried to forget about it but Paul's apparently not going to let that happen so I might as well deal with it now."

Jacob chuckled before Marley froze in front of the porch steps, peering back at her car- wondering if she still had a chance to escape.

"Let's go," Jacob sensed her hesitation and put a hand on her back to guide her up the steps and held the door open for her.

Quil was the first one to acknowledge the pair walking in. He stepped out from behind the counter as he dried his hands on a burgundy dish towel, looking between Marley and Jacob.

"Hi Quil," She greeted softly and he nodded in response.

"You doing alright?" Quil inquired, hesitantly keeping a distance from her as he awaited an answer. She offered a quiet "yes" and mustered a nervous smile.

The kitchen was flooded with silence as no one attempted to continue the conversation, Marley shuffled her feet awkwardly. "Are you a-" She muttered and Quil nodded slowly. She sucked in a deep breath and looked up at Jacob who stood with his hands in his pockets.

"Where's Paul?" Jacob cleared his throat and watched as Quil pointed to the glass sliding doors that led to the backyard. "Emily told them to rinse off outside."

They walked towards the back doors and Marley caught a glimpse at the shirtless men fighting over the hose. Jacob chuckled as he slid the door open and looked to Marley to join him but she shook her head. "You don't want to say hi to everyone? The girls have really missed you."

"I just need to talk to Paul alone quickly," Jake evidently deflated at her response. He knew that if she wasn't intending to stick around, then it meant Paul wasn't going to receive the news he had been hoping for.

"Alright, I'll go get him for you." She watched as Jacob marched over to Paul and pointed in her direction. Paul grinned in response, patting Jake on the shoulder as he jogged towards the house.

"Marley," He breathed as he stepped into the air conditioning and closed the door behind him. His ink colored hair flopped on his forehead- soaked from Embry spraying him with the hose. Paul smelt of salt, his bare chest slick with sweat as he moved in her direction.

"Can we talk?" Marley questioned faintly, fiddling with the end of her tank top. He nodded eagerly, and brushed his hand through his hair.

"Don't you want to greet everyone first?" He repeated Jacob's question, wiping his hands on his shorts. She swallowed and shook her head.

"I have to get going soon, this shouldn't take long." Marley watched as his eyes darkened, and the relief seemed to drain from his face as he caught on. He huffed and nodded, gesturing to the front door.

"We can talk out front," He grunted and trudged past her and down the porch steps, stopping just in front of her car.

"Paul," She trailed off as she realized how agitated he had become.

"What do you want me to say, Marley?" Paul spat, trying to keep his distance from her. He paced as his annoyance overwhelmed his head.

She crossed her arms over her chest, her hands clammy as she watched him lose control. "I don't want you to say anything, I just came to end this once and for all."

He laughed dryly, looking at her as if she had two heads. "You can't end an imprint, whether you like it or not."

Marley frowned at his statement, shifting her feet. "So I get no say in the matter, huh?" She snorted angrily.

"You think I have a choice? About the imprint or the fact that I turn into a fucking werewolf?!" He growled, furrowing his eyebrows. Marley stepped back as he raised his voice, her heart beat quickening as Paul progressively got more and more irate.

"I have no choice, Marley. I tried to ignore this entire imprint situation but now I realize I can't push it away because whether I like it or not, we're bonded for the rest of our lives. That's why I came to your house to talk about this." He spat, gesturing between them. "Because we might as well be civil since we are going to be stuck together forever."

She stayed silent, watching as he rubbed his face with his hands and took deep breaths to calm himself down.

"Okay," She spoke softly and Paul peered up in confusion.

"Okay what?" He repeated, furrowing his brows. Marley shrugged as if to say 'Fuck it!'

"You said it yourself, we're going to be stuck together forever so might as well be civil." Marley caved, tucking her hair behind her ears. Paul eye-balled her, still confused.

They stood silently once again, awaiting for the other to speak.

"So what now?" Marley broke the silence. Paul chuckled and wiped his mouth with his calloused fingers.

"We figure it out, I guess." Paul hummed.

"Baby steps?" She offered, tilting her head to block the sun from her eyes.

"Baby steps." He confirmed.