Seventeen As:

Seventeen as bad choices

s.coups: every1 likes you but soon u end up as a single parent struggling to get thru college and u end up alon bc ur bby die nd haunts u 5ever stay in skool

jeonghan: u feel pretty like once but den u get all dese hoes goin after ur cute twink ass but ur like "I didn't want dis" but duh peer pressure too much so u hoe urself out nd cheat on ur decent bf

joshua: ur a good christian boy but satan tempted u so u try one drug nd now ur like lay but on 24222 more doses of lsd nd u killed a man already

jun: u get all duh girls in de club in fact u got too many and dunno what 2 do with all of them so u just keep pimpin urself out for dem and now ur a mormon with like 28 wives

hoshi: ur so damn hyper bc every mornin u chug 29 5 hour energy bottles so now u awake for 225 hours nd u end up robbing a poor old lady bc all dat sugar went 2 ur cerebellum and ur brain stem has officially McRotted away

woozi: man u just cant stAND ppl so u end up plotting world domination to put those peasant homo sapiens in their place but what u don't realize is that ur 3'11 so u cant even reach a grape

dk: ur a happy dude and u don't make any bad choices bc ur a tru child of god

wonwoo: u have no friends bc u cold as ur freezer but u want friends so badly but no like u so u get so depress ur like "I end myself" but it turns out u just had a bad dream and u overreacted like the emo fck u are

mingyu: ur a clumsy oaf but ur so oblivious to it nd u like McFall on a baby and u end up eating the baby bc ur stupid gut is never full and u eat the mother too when she presses charges

the8: ur a trainee in the shaolin temple but ur dream is 2 b-boy so u escape but master finds u and executes u by getting jun to sit on ur face

seungkwan: u start so much drama that a drama about ur life is like 2929482992 episodes long and every1 h8s u but u like "f the haters" and u get jumped one day in the hood and u have no money now

vernon: u wanted 2 make a living by rapping but like u get discriminated bc u asian and white so u like "headlines headlines" but it doesn't work and now ur a meme

dino: u make a fake id to get into those bars even tho u like 10 and u get busted literally and ur mom is so mad @ u that u get kicked out of the house and u get no christmas