Fade Away ↠ Paul Lahote

Eighteen.

{Please take everything medical and/or cancer-related mentioned in here with a grain of salt. I am not a medical professional.}

With Nelly in the hospital receiving treatment for the umpteenth time, it gives her the time to watch all the movies she had been meaning but kept forgetting to watch. Her dad is sitting with her watching Sing, a cartoon movie about animals in a singing competition. Nelly's given a few good laughs at it, especially when it comes to the pigs.

On her third day of treatment, Nelly has finished her movie list and now has nothing to do. Her dad and Charlie had come in to visit this morning briefly just to say that they were going fishing and would be back before visiting hours ended. Jacob was doing something with Nessie and couldn't make it and Paul was out somewhere with the pack. And considering that it was nearly eleven on a Wednesday, having Jordan for company was out of the question.

Nelly thought of playing a round of solitaire, but groans when she realizes that she doesn't have any cards. Sure, she has her laptop. But there's only so many things to do on it before boredom kicks in and then it's just a useless brick. The same goes for her phone.

She decides that she might as well nap for a lack of anything better to do when Carlisle walks into her room. Nelly stares at him, shocked, but smiles anyway. It's a pleasant surprise and Nelly is more than glad to have company.

"Hello Nelly," Carlisle says in his usual soft slash calm voice.

"Hey," she says. "What are you doing here?"

"Jacob mentioned the other day that you were back in for treatment," he answers, taking the seat next to her bed. Nelly swings around to face him, keeping a watchful eye on the IV hanging from her arm. "I thought I'd come say hello for a bit."

"I'm happy you did," Nelly says. "It's boring in here without any company. I mean, the nurses and my doctor pop in every now and then to check on me and make small talk, but it's not the same."

Carlisle laughs. "I guess it wouldn't be. How have you been?"

Nelly shrugs. "Normal. I had a rough bought of nausea yesterday and a major headache, but other than that it's been fine."

"And you're taking...?"

"Cladribine."

"Yes, right. It's been working for you okay?"

"I think so?" Nelly flushes slightly and admits, "I tend to zone out all the fancy medical talk Doctor Bishop says to me regarding treatment. It's not that I don't want to know, it's just that it doesn't make that much sense to me and everything he says kind of sounds like 'wah wah wah'."

"You need to pay attention," Carlisle chastises. "It's important for you to know what's being done to your body and for you to know how it's affecting you. Cancer is a very serious thing, Nelly."

"I know," Nelly mutters. "But it's been a year. I'm tired of it. Sometimes I dream that this was all just a terrible nightmare and that I'm healthy and in school and practicing for auditioning for Julliard." Nelly shakes her head with an empty smile. "And then I wake up and I'm either here or at my house and where all of my pill bottles are sitting."

Carlisle reaches over and sets his hand on top of Nelly's. "I know it's hard," he says, "but if you keep receiving treatment, this will all go away and you will be able to do what you wish when it's all done." Nelly nods her head even though she doesn't believe him. A life after cancer? Yeah, right. Even if she does go into remission and doesn't have to worry about coming to the hospital every bloody month, she still has to be on her feet and careful. Cancer never fully goes away.