Normani laid soundly asleep as Lauren sat up,her head against the headboard. One earbud was in her ear while the other one dangled. It was about 2 am and she was still going over the songs she had recorded the day before. It was frustrating that she didn't feel strongly about any of them after spending 12 hours of her time recording it. Next to her Normani shuffled around. Lauren looked over at her sleeping girlfriend and smiled abit. She wasn't the most attractive sleeper but seeing her so content made Lauren love it.
She lightly taped Normani's shoulder causing the sleeping beauty to shuffle around some more. "Babe." Lauren whispered as she shook her lightly.
"Mmmm Lauren not tonight. I'm not up for it." Normani mumbled as she swatted Laurens hand away. Lauren let out a small chuckle. "I'm not waking you up because I want to have sex Mani." Lauren stated.
"Well then let me sleep." Normani mumbled again before rolling over to face the other side of the room. Lauren let out another amused chuckle.
"Well I guess I'll let you sleep with your bonnet falling off your head." Lauren said still very amused. Normani jumped up,lightly touching her hair to feel where the bonnet was. Lauren reached behind her and grabbed the silky bonnet off of Normani's pillow.
"Here," she handed the bonnet to her tired girlfriend. The sleeping beauty quickly grabbed it and put it back on her head,hoping it wouldn't fall off again.
"Thank you baby." Normani said before giving Lauren a small peck. She laid back down and closed her eyes,while Lauren finally decided to close her laptop and forget about the songs.
"Eh,y'know I'm kinda up for sex right now." Lauren said as she laid on her back.
"Y'know, I've had enough of you for the night. Go to bed Lauren."Normani said sternly.
"But baaaabeeee,it's been two days."
"And now its gonna be 3. Go to bed Lauren, I have a shoot tomorrow."
Lauren sighed in defeat. She rolled over on her side and scooted closer to her cranky girlfriend.
"Lauren I sai-"
"Relax,I just want to cuddle. I can't believe this is how I get treated after telling you about your bonnet." Lauren cut her off and draped her arm over Normani's waist. Normani let out an amused sigh. "One of these days I'm gonna need you to not wake me up & just put it back on for me."
"Yeah yeah. Go to sleep Normani,you have a shoot tomorrow" Lauren mocked.
Normani POV
Normani was stunned. She couldn'tbelieve what had just taken place inside of Laurens apartment. She couldn't believe it was that easy for Lauren to find her way into her pants. She couldn't believe that she actually enjoyed that moment so much that apart of her wants to make a U turn and go back to Lauren'sto finish what they started. Guilt didn't even come to mind until she reached her own apartment. Her bedroom smelled of Darius. His deodorant's scent was engulfed by the covers on his side of the bed. Normani was thankful that Darius decided to stay at his place,because she wouldn't be able to face him at the moment.
She allowed herself to plop on the bed making the headboard hit against the wall. Confused wasn't a powerful enough word to describe the emotions running through her body. Lauren clearly still had some sort of hold on her and that made Normani angry. There was a power struggle going on between the two and today Lauren showed her who had all of it. It was time to have a check in with herself. Time to figure out where her emotions were and what her heart has been trying to tell her.
She knew that she loved Lauren.
She knew that she loved having sex with Lauren.
But she still didn'tknow if she was still in love with her.
Safe to say the self check in did nothing. Normani was still confused and now the guilt was beginning to eat at her. She needed to talk to the someone honest. Picking up the her phoneshe dialed a number then put the phone up to her ear.
"Hello?"
"Ally. Its Mani" she says drained.
"Oh hey girl! We haven't talked since the launch party! How's life?" Ally's bright filled up the whole conversation.
"Well its fucked right now. Litterally."
"Oh girl don't be so dramatic! What happened." Ally laughs.
"I just let Lauren do stuff to me."
"Um what? Like what kind of stuff."
"Sexual." Normani let out. Still shocked at what just happened saying it out loud didn't sound believable.
"Mani.......this is bad."
Normani let out a fustrated sigh. "I know Ally."
"Like this is just gonna confuse you both more.."
"I know Ally."
"How did you let this happen!?"
"I don't know Ally."
"I mean what about Darius!"
DARIUS,she forgot all about him. What was she going to do? Telling him would be the right thing to do but she wasn't sure if she wanted to deal with the consequences of this event just yet.
"Shit,Ally."
"You have to tell him."
Normani knew that,but she didn't want to tell him. She knew that this would never happen again. She would never fall so easily into Lauren again after this night.
"I-I..I can't. Well not today atleast."
"You guys didn't have sex right?" Ally asked.
"No,she........she just fingered me."
"Yeah,I didn't ask for all of that.....but thats not so bad. Tell him when you're ready but don't procrastinate Mani. It'll make it worse"
Ally was right. The longer she waited the worse the situation would be. She couldn't believe Lauren put her in this position. Maybe now she could slightly understand why Lauren didn't tell her about her own cheating. The fear of losing the other person once you tell them is pure agony. But unlike Lauren she wasn't a coward.
"I'm giving myself 2 days to tell him. I won't procrastinate."Normani said firmly as a tear rolled down her cheek.
"That's my girl! I hope it ends well. I'll talk to you later hun!" Ally said before hanging up.
Lauren POV
She felt accomplished. She now knew that she still had some sort of power over Normani. After all this time,Normani still loved the way Lauren touched her. This made their situation much more ou'd a mess. She must helped Normani chest pon her boyfriend and a part ou'd get was guilty about that. While the majority of her couldn't care less because in the end he didn't belong there.
She was the love of her life and not one person was gonna take that title away from Lauren. No matter how many times she fucks up Normani will be there for her and she will be there for Normani. Thats how loved worked or so she thought. Maybe that's how toxicity worked, if so she wasn't ready to admit it. Things only got toxic with them when they were away from each other for too long. They too much distance between them that have them too much time to overthink every aspect ou'd their relationship just to fuck it up when they came back to each other. But there was no one she'd rather fuck up with than Normani.
There was no other person in the world that Lauren would fight this hard for. After showering she sat on her bed,her head resting against the headboard. She looked at the empty pillow next to her. The pillow that should have Normani's fallen bonnet placed softly on top of it. It was weird sleeping by herself, she wasn't that big of a fan. But until she could get Normani to be hers again,it would be something she'd have to grow to like.
A/n
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