Drowning

t w o

[ In this scene, there is mild swearing. Therefore be aware. ]

What am I going to do? Zosia is walking towards me... I can't speak to her, I'll panic.

Social anxiety sucks, especially if all I want to do is speak to some pretty girl instead of instantly having sex with her.

It's fine Oliver. You can handle this. No maybe I can't.

Social anxiety sucks.

"Hey Ollie."

I couldn't move my mouth, so I just ignored her. She clearly wasn't interested as she just walked off.

In my head all I could think was 'oh my god did Zosia just talk to me?' I couldn't even move my lips

Social anxiety sucks.

Why am I shaking? Body just stop fucking shaking.

Social anxiety sucks.

I know what I'll do, I'll text her. Explain everything. Here it goes:

Oliver:
Hey Zosia!

Zosia:
Hi Ollie...

Oliver:
Wanna hang out after work?

Zosia:
I'm working, please stop texting me.

Oliver:

Zosia:
Quit the memes Oliver.

Oliver:
Why?

Zosia:
I'm going.

Zosia march left conversation.

For fuck sake. I blew it. We were best friends once as well; even if that was back in med school.

We had our own little place. My treehouse. I miss it. Enough down memory lane Oliver, let's get back to work.

❂

I could hear Jac shouting at me from down the corridor, so I knew I was either in trouble or there was a patient who needed me.

"Oliver, my office, now."

You could hear her voice from a million miles away. Jac Naylor is the director of CT, as well as the ice queen of Holby.

I walked towards the consultants office and took a big gulp. I knew I was going to be in big trouble.

I knocked on the door before opening it because I knew for a fact Jac would complain at me for that as well.

"Come in."

I opened the door and there in front of me was Jac, sat in her chair and fiddling with a pen of hers.

"Doctor Valentine, what's this I hear about you messaging Doctor March whilst working?"

Damn it. Zosia you little snake. All I wanted to do was explain my social anxiety and depression to you.

"Are you going to explain yourself then??" Jac didn't look best pleased with the fact I wasn't responding.

"I'm sorry-y, I won-n't do it again-n"

I stuttered.

Why the fuck am I stuttering to Jac. She can't know about my mental health issues, she just can't.

"Fine Valentine. Don't do it again. Now, get out."

And on that note, I left the room. I instantly knew what my next move was going to be.

But would Zosia even want me? I don't even think she likes me. Anyway, why would she want a weird 'boyfriend' like me?

Jac calls me weird. My friends call me weird. Even my family call me weird. So maybe I am. Zosia probably hates people like me.

Weird losers who has sex with girls without formally introducing themselves first.