THE BOAT TRIP: Stampy And Squid

Far too much mistletoe

--SQUIDS POV--
"Come on mate have a drink." I encouraged, pouring a glass out for both of us.
"Nope. I've given up." Joe said.
"What the hell man! Come on don't be a bore!"
"I was shot! I'm under medication!" Joe said,
"Well I was shot emotionally! I'm heart broken- look!"
"What am I looking at exactly?" Joe asked.. but I couldn't remember.
"Uhh.. don't know. Don't drink, Joe. It's bad for you."
"Well, okay then!" He laughed.
"When can you drink again?" I asked,
"In a week, when I get off meds." He said, "but I'm gonna stay off alcohol for life from now on, take it as a New Years resolution."
"You are totally not keeping that." I responded, sipping my wine. "Come on its Christmas Day!" I whined, pouring more rosé out of the bottle.
"Not even a gin and tonic?" I asked,
"Nope."
"A beer?"
"Nope."
"An alcopop?"
"What the heck is an alcopop?"
"I dunno.. heard about them in a drinking booklet in college."
"You read them articles?"
"Yeh. I'm a pioneer."
"David. Pioneers are religious people who pledge never to drink and are based in Ireland." Joe told me, "you are neither religious or Irish and you are drunk."
"I'm not drunk, I'm sleepy. And I'm religious, don't you see the necklace I'm wearing? It's go a crucifix on it!"
"Nope, it has a cross on it, there's a difference."
"Still. I'm a pioneer okay?"
"Okay then." Joe accepted, laughing.

I had lost count how many glasses of wine I had taken. All I knew was that a once big bottle of wine was empty and I was the only one drinking.

We had bacon and potatoes for our Christmas dinner. The bacon was just about to go out of date and the potatoes were rock-hard.. but it was nice. I thought it might have been nice to swirl the potatoes in bacon to make some kind of rosté. I'm such a chef.

--STAMPYS POV--
"We really should have bought more food in Adelaide."
"Yeah.. are we still going to Auckland?" Squid asked,
"Hmm, do we want the boat to have another name, get whipped by the end of Harry's belt and actually see our boss?"
"N..no." Squid said,"but we gotta see Sqaishey."
"It's okay she won't come." I said, "I wouldn't if I was her."
"But you aren't her.. so she might come." David added.
I rolled my eyes, I didn't have a clue what to do or say.
"I cheated on her, no one should forgive me." I said.
"Who cares! It's Christmas!" David shouted. I just laughed, he was so drunk.
The phone rang.. it was Harry Ardtole again.
"Bollox." I said.
"Let me do the talking." David said,
"No you are drunk, I'll speak."

We were out on deck, it was about 11pm, I assumed it was early Christmas morning with him.
"It's a face time." I sighed, answering it. Both of us were wearing white shirts at least, I put on my glasses to make me look more intelligent, David put his on too.
"Hello Mr Ardtole!" I greeted, "merry Christmas."
"Why is it dark where you are?" Harry asked,
"Well, sir, we are in the Southern Hemisphere. You are in the northern hemisphere."
"And how does that explain the darkness?"
"We are eleven hours ahead. It's 11pm where we are."
"Hello Harry!" David intruded,
"Well I am glad that you have educated yourself."
"Pfft, its basic knowledge- didn't you know the earth had two hemispheres?"
"Of course i did." Harry responded, David started to laugh.
"Are you sure my gentle companion?" David laughed. I put my finger over my lips trying to silence him.
"Some days we can never be sure of anything. Just the land and the sky. The dark and the light. The truth of birth and certain death the-"
"Sorry we're breaking up." I lied. What the hell is Harry going on about?!
"The love of a woman, compassion of a man. The adventure and the-"
I hung up and laughed.
"What the hell was he on about?! What a total nut head!" I laughed.
"He's off his face! What does he know about love?! He probably gave birth the the queen!" David teased. Falling over.
"What do you know about love?" I asked David, raising an eyebrow.
"More than you. You tell a girl you love her then get another girl pregnant."
My mouth dropped, "okay I deserved that."
"Anyway look what I've got!" David pulled something green out of  his blazer pocket.
"Th-that's not m-mistletoe is it." I laughed,  David continued to pull it out of his pocket.
"Mate..." I said uneasily,
"Come on let's get you into bed." I said, putting a hand on his shoulder as I opened the cabin doors.
"Come on now." I laughed as David waved the mistletoe up in the air. "Mate you are so drunk!" I laughed before he kissed me.
"Oooh Kay." I said, shocked, "let's hope you don't remember this." I said as we tumbled down the stairs to the kitchen. "You miss it don't you." I said, as he kissed my neck and closed his eyes.
"Miss what?" He mumbled, unbuttoning my shirt.
"Well.. being alone with your lassie, in a bedroom preferably." I raised an eyebrow.
"No." David denied, while I rested him onto the bed.
"Then why are you doing this." I asked him,
"The broccoli." He said,
"The what..?" I asked,
"Broccoli!" He said again.
"You mean the mistletoe?" I corrected, laughing.
"Yeh whatever, the green stuff." He said, crawling on top of me.
"Squid are you sure that this is appropriate?" I asked, trying to get him under the covers.
"It's Christmas stamps." He said, kissing my neck, he took off my shirt,
"You are totally gonna forget in the morning." I breathed, putting my arms around him and pushing him under the covers. When I finally put the covers over him he put his head on the pillow and collapsed.
"There you go old man." I sighed, putting the covers over him as he closed his eyes with his mouth wide open.
"I'm never gonna let this go, y'know." I laughed. He put a hand out and touched my face as I tucked him in, he kissed me on the lips quickly. I smiled, "we're such a weird couple." I sighed, "Merry Christmas." I said. As David passed out with his hand stretched out along the bed.

I quickly walked back up on the deck, the night was bright, there was a full moon.
I sat down beside the control panel and turned off the engines, putting down the anchor. Letting the world stop for just a moment.
I lay down on the bed, shifting Davids arm.
There was no engine rumble. You could just hear the waves.
"A night of silence.." I sighed. Closing my eyes before David started to sing,
"Siiiilent night! Hooooly night."
"Squid, shut the hell up."