THE BOAT TRIP: Stampy And Squid

Unrecognisable

--STAMPYS POV--
David and I were walking along a corridor when we saw an open balcony. We sat on the railings, looking around with a glass of wine in our hands.
"Wasn't your New Years resolution to stop drinking?" Squid asked me,
"Oh yeah... " I realised, spitting out the wine onto the ground far below us.
"Eew." Squid muttered, scrunching up his face.
"Aaaggghhhh!!!!" Someone screamed from above us, but before I could look up one of the glamorous glittery ladies landed in my arms making me fall back onto the ground of the balcony with my eyes wide in shock.
"You saved my life!" She exclaimed, putting her hands on my cheeks, "you saved me.." She whispered, moving her face towards mine,
"N-no-" I began but it was too late, she had already pushed me up against the wall kissing me.
I had entered the stage of great shock.
Nope. Nope. Get her off me. Close your eyes Joe. You're at home with a cup of tea, happy or on the boat.. Watching the waves move in the sunlit sky.
David was falling down on the ground laughing with tears streaming out of his eyes patting the ground because his stomach hurt so much from laughing.
A man walked in offering drinks before he saw us.. Well, Sophie, that was her name, right? As I hoped very much that in this point of my life I was invisible.
When she eventually let me breathe from my mouth again I still stayed in the same position, in deep and utter shock.
"Is it over?!" I gasped to Squid.
"It's do-" but just as he was about to finish Sophie proceeded to kissing my neck.
"Okay! Okay! Enough! Please!" I shouted, pushing her away. "I have a girlfriend."
"Oh, sorry sir I wasn't aware." She responded,
"Pfft! You don't say!" David laughed in the background.

Once Sophie ran off I leant against the wall beside David, the same man came in offering us drinks,
"I'll take one of those now please." I said, my eyes still wide. David was still in stitches laughing,
"I have never seen someone look as uncomfortable making out in my life!" He chuckled, "your hands! It looked like you were doing star jumps!"
I just laughed with him, taking a sip of wine, "that better not happen again." I sighed, "anyway I'm gonna try and find an arrest room." I said,
"Y'wha?!"
"Or.. Whatever they call the bathroom in America."
"A restroom?"
"That's the one, thanks mate." I said, walking out with a glass of red wine in my hands.
"Oh my god!" A woman said, stepping in front of me.. Now is not the time to be recognised. "Stampy..."
"I'm not." I assured,
"You look like Stampy." She responded, taking a good look at me.
"You are the first person ever to say that to me." I told her, "are you sure? Hasn't he got bigger hair? Bit taller? Wears glasses?"
The woman then put on her glasses and took a closer look at me, inspecting me,
"Actually.. On second thoughts you don't look like him at all... You look more like Squid, he's the handsome one." She flirted. My mouth dropped with offence and horror.
"What a bitch!" I muttered walking into the bathroom, gulping my glass of wine.

--SQUIDS POV--
"Excuse me, Mr Spencer, someone has requested to see you." A man said, walking out onto the balcony,
"Sure, who is it?" I asked before I turned around and Nicole was there.
My mouth dropped. She looked... Different.
I ran over to her and hugged her, "you didn't have to come." I told her, wrapped my arms around her neck.
"Yeah but you sounded like you needed a hug, and a bottle of something bad for you." Something was different about her voice too.
"Well now I have both." I said, smiling, looking into her eyes,
"Maybe you want a little more than a hug." She whispered, I rubbed my nose against hers and put my hands on her cheeks, then I closed my eyes and our lips collided-
"Oh for fu*k's sake!" Stampy yelled walking in the room, Nicole and I pulled apart.
"Language Joseph!" I replied, telling him off.
"Just because I had the worst kiss of my life doesn't mean you have to rub it in!"
"Pfft- it was funny though! What got so you angry all of sudden?" I asked,
"Some woman downstairs.. Hi Nicole by the way!" He said, waving, "anyway! Don't let me interrupt!" Joe then walked away from the balcony and went back inside.
"Crazy man. So.. Where were we?" I asked, taking a hold of her waist and her cheek.

--STAMPYS POV--
I walked back down into the main hall trying to stay in a straight line. My hands clutched to the railing.
"Hello Stampy?" Some man said, I rolled my eyes and turned around, putting on a smile and shaking their hands.
"I am Mr Frawder," the man began, my mouth dropped. B-but we just fired you.. Oh god this is awkward.. "I was wondering if you could do some modelling for the Boat Trip merchandise, here's the address, tomorrow afternoon, 1pm."
"Y....yes... Sure..." I said, awkwardly. Before a security guard put his hand on Mr Frawder's shoulder saying, "come this way please sir."
I bit my lip in anticipation. I think he's about to be fired in there... AAAAGGHHH!

--SQUIDS POV--
As Nicole and I ran and locked the disabled toilets I pulled off her dress before noticing..
"Your birthmark.. It's gone?" I felt her stomach,
"Y-yeah I .. Got it removed." She responded,
"And you had a tattoo there.." I pointed to her thigh. Before I stood up. "Oh my god! You aren't Nicole! You're just some randomer with stick on tattoos and a wig!"
"Dave-"
"Nicole doesn't call me Dave! You are disgusting!" I yelled, zipping up my trousers and leaving.
I ran downstairs where Joe was eating something.
"Hey." I said, sitting down and taking a bite of whatever he was eating. "Eew what was that?"
"Some kind of seeds wrapped in spinach. Where's Nicole?"
"In England." I said,
"B-but-"
"Let's just say you aren't the only one to snog a stranger today." I sighed, shaking and putting my hand on his wrists.
"So that wasn't Nicole- she looked like Nicole.."
"Yeah.. She did.. Oh god there she is.."
Stampy then put his glasses on and took a closer look. Inspecting her.
"On second thoughts you don't look like Nicole at all. You look more like Sqaishey, the handsome one." He flirted. My mouth dropped with offence and horror.
"What a bitch!" I muttered to him.